when your head is at war with your heart, do this..

screen-shot-2016-12-13-at-7-39-04-amI should want this, I remember saying to myself after I got a job offer from a non-profit years ago.

It was everything I said I wanted. Steady pay, a heart-centered mission and would help kids indirectly. I would use my writing skills, my organizational skills…it was consistent.

But everything in my body just felt… tight.

You should want this, Diana. This is a good opportunity my mind kept chiming in.

Have you ever had this happen to you, where your head and your heart are at war?

For days, I tortured myself with sleepless, fitful nights where I battled out pros and cons in my head, tried to justify that I would still make time for the things that really made my heart sing; you know the drill, right?

But something deep deep inside me told me that if I took that job, I really wouldn’t make time for my dreams. I would be doing it because of fear and risk-avoidance. Not because it truly lit up my creative juices and felt expansive.

I should want it. But I just really didn’t.

In the end, I listened to my body, turned the offer down with bated breath …and my life took on a completely different trajectory. I ended up going back to school to get my yoga teacher certification and life coaching certification, living in the desert and reconnecting with my mother. Not exactly the plan, but I was so happy.

When I followed my intuition, everything inside me breathed a sigh of relief because I was aligned and centered with my Soul.

Was it a risk? Yes!

Was it worth it? Yes!

But every time you turn down a “should,” you train your subconscious mind to receive an absolute-OMG-I-couldn’t-have-imagined-this-YES! Tweet that!

The first weekend seminar of coaching school, I landed my very first coaching client!

Could I have seen that that would happen? No way Jose!

But that’s an example of how the Universe can surprise us and open you up to a world of possibilities you couldn’t even see before…when you choose your Truth over your insecurities or fears.

Soul Q: Have you ever experienced a war between your head and your heart? What was the situation and how did you move through it? Share! (I promise to read every single one, although I cannot guarantee a reply!)

That’s one of the things we are going to explore in Self Care for Your Soul in 2017.

And if you know that you’re tired of making decisions based on what you should want vs. what you really really really want, the good news is that it’s possible.

It requires learning how to make aligned decisions that bring you closer to your Purpose.

It’s about learning how to stop capping your own spiritual potential to receive.

Want to learn how? Early-bird registration ends Dec 15 (two days away!). Click here to learn more and grab your spot!

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the best love and life advice I ever got (true story)

Have you ever been on a date or had a big decision or presentation at work to make and you literally can’t stop your brain from totally spinning out of control like a hamster on a wheel on steroids?

That was me.

I’d like to share a true story with you with the intent that it helps you love and trust yourself more. It’s a story about business but really it’s about loving yourself full out and falling in love with the real you. Would that be ok?

It was Circa 2012.

I remember sitting in my apartment, crying and stressed out because I didn’t know what to call myself.

I was on the phone with my astrologer and halfway through my rant about how I didn’t know if I was on the right track in my business, in my life, in my crazy dating life that inspired The Dating Mirror, he shut me up in his very classy, British way.

And told me some of the hands-down best advice I’ve ever received in my entire life.

Let me take you back

But before I spill the beans, to fully appreciate his advice, here’s a little background on where it came from:

I was at a place in my business where everything was expanding. Like faster than I could imagine and I was constantly putting pressure on myself to label myself for the masses.

For those of you who have been following me for awhile, you’ve seen me go through several incarnations and brand names.

I started out doing Angel readings on the streets of San Francisco (no joke!), became a Reiki Master Teacher and got a radio and TV gig doing readings for people live on air for four years. I was unofficially labeled The Next Doreen Virtue.

Then years ago at a mastermind, a mentor came up with the name, The CEO Psychic, for my business. It was true. A lot of my clients are CEO’s and big shots in their industries. I shared the same stage as Deepak Chopra and went on with that moniker and brand and my career shot way up.

And shortly after that, because a lot of my clients really wanted my help with their relationships, family and self-confidence (even though they would come to me initially for business intuition advice and cleverly sneak it in at the end!) Five Star Love Life came about. But throughout each brand evolution, I realized something huge.

The Trouble with Labels

All were fabulous monikers and names to be associated with. Clever. Clear. Sexy.

The trouble was, I found that each time I tried to label myself, I started to feel weird.

I went way more into my head than was helpful.

I started trying to fit myself into a neat little box that came with owning a particular “name” and it brought up a lot of pressure, anxiety and self doubt.

  • I felt scattered and my life really mirrored that.
  • I had success but I was all over the place, literally.

I think I moved four times between 2011-2013.

  • My weight was up and down.
  • I had really great men in my life who I (or they) for one reason or another just couldn’t commit to.

And I really had to work hard to find my center. Because something felt well, off, but I couldn’t quite pinpoint it. I needed help.

So I booked a session with my astrologer.

And here is what he said:

“Stop thinking so much. You’re so much better when you don’t think.”

He knew that going into my head first wasn’t my Zone of Genius. It was my Zone of Chaos. The breakthroughs came when I sank into the flow of the moment and then made decisions from my gut. And then and only then, assessed with the analytical mind. When I reversed the order, I just diluted my own power.

So often, especially in our relationships, we over think things.

We make lists when we should just enjoy be-ing.

And when we are too in our head, we tend to switch off our hearts and switch on the judgement.

And the criticism. And the pressure.

Especially self-inflicted pressure. And then we aren’t truly engaging with the other person anymore. Or our life. And we start to sabotage….and we wonder why our life isn’t shaping up the way we want

Change can bring you back to yourself

I knew something had to change and it could only come from within me. So I made a commitment to stop trying to label myself and instead focused on how I could serve the world with my message: to help people trust and love themselves in a soulful way. 

Once the pressure of having to “find and fit a label” was consciously lifted off, I found that every area of my life improved.

  • I lost weight and had more energy for the things I loved.
  • I became way better at managing my money and investing in things I value vs things I think I should have.
  • And I attracted my current partner who truly accepts and loves me for who I am.

But none of that could have happened as quickly as it did if I hadn’t

  1. Consciously taken a step back to look at where I was choosing to place my energy (into obsessively over thinking and measuring every choice against how it fit into a stupid box vs. just being in the moment.)
  2. Seeing the blessings each incarnation brought me (gratitude and grace) and
  3. Made the choice to be present without worrying so much about what other people (and I) thought of me

It all begins with a simple choice to do things differently.

So, now over to you.

Q: Where do you need to stop overthinking things in your life?

Q: Where could you benefit from relaxing into the here and now?

Q: What could be possible when you do this?

Share with me in the comments below!

Want to significantly increase your energy + release old crap? Sign up for the New Moon global heart healing this Sunday, Oct 30!  (it’s FREE and it WILL be powerful!!)

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krishna + a magical story about stepping into your ‘queen’ self

So as you may remember, not so long ago, I finally listened to my back’s signs and bought a new mattress.

What I didn’t share in that post was that I got myself a full size even though I really wanted a queen size.

I’ve had a full size for as long as I can remember but something kept saying, “Diana you are totally ready for a queen. Why are you holding back?”

Part 1: Being Comfortable

I ignored my intuitive hunches.

Why?

I’m not quite sure. A full was…fine. It was… comfortable. I was used to it. I also just didn’t feel like getting a new box spring or deal with putting together a new frame, blah, blah, blah. Excuses.

You: This is how it can be with love.

We get so used to what is comfortable, even though it has stopped serving our Path anymore.

We stay far too long in a relationship (or invest in being single even though we want to be with a partner) because we’re afraid.

Afraid of the changes we’d have to make, or that we perceive we’d have to give up in order to have what we truly desire.

Part 2: Being Aware of Mirrors

But the funny thing was that once the full arrived, it literally was too big for the frame and box spring I had! It spilled out on the sides and was too long! Almost like I’d bought a queen, but not quite. I called it an “Almost Queen.”

And I laughed out loud, because I had just had a conversation with a girlfriend about how it’s time for us to step into our fullest Queen Self to empower even more women…but that I still felt like I wasn’t quite ready. I had long left my “Princess-damsel-in-distress-come-rescue-me” self behind but Queen? I still felt a teeny bit out of my league.

And my bed reflected that! It was too big for what I had, too small to be in a queen!

You: Reflecting on yourself, perhaps in one of your relationships you may be in the same place. Clear on where you want to go, but not quite feeling worthy/ready/sure you’re ready to be the woman you need to be to have it.

Pay attention to the mirrors in your life. Where is your environment reflecting your current self-image? What does it say? Is it what you want?

Simply notice. Be aware.

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Part 3: Being the Queen…and accepting more than you bargained for

Like you may feel with your own relationships, I didn’t plunge head first into anything after I became aware of the mirrors the bed choice was reflecting back to me.

Sometimes nothing really happens until what we tolerate becomes intolerable (or we get so annoyed by the insistent nudge of our desires that something has to change/leave/come in).

Just the other day, I was literally moved with every fiber of my being to contact customer service about exchanging the mattress.

I bought it on Amazon, so it wasn’t as easy as just having them change it out at the store and I had thrown out the box…so I wasn’t sure how it all worked.

But I was so clear that I wanted a queen, even if there were changes and charges involved. It was fully aligned with my desire and had been for quite some time.

And yet, I was strangely detached from the whole thing, choosing to just simply ask questions and show up to see what they said.

Long story short, I spoke to a woman named Rachel and a man who called himself (get this) Krishna! As in the Hindu supreme God of love! I laughed so hard at the irony.

Between the two, Divine embodiment of the feminine/masculine if I ever saw it, a miracle happened.

They immediately issued me a credit for the full amount of the full size so I could get the queen size…and told me to please keep the full size! No need to ship it back or return before getting a refund.

I thought I read the screen wrong. Nope. They were serious. I was getting not only the exact mattress I wanted…but also getting to keep the super comfortable, practically brand-new one as well for my guest room!

Now, I’m sure that to some people, you could rationalize it logically, saying, “Well, they figured it wasn’t worth their trouble to try to take back a mattress out the box, etc..” but…

To me, it was a symbol of the spirit of ABUNDANCE and the magic that comes when we step fully into our desires.

I learned that a big part of manifesting miracles is that you really do have to be prepared to put yourself ALL IN.

No room for wiggling, half-assing or bargaining with your desires.

No back doors.

All in. Then the Universe storms the gates and bends over backwards to help you out.

I was prepared to pay for both shipping and a new mattress in order to get what I really wanted.

But it turns out, I didn’t have to do that.

But I was 100% willing.

Your turn: Where in your life have you been tip toeing, dipping your toe in towards what you want, but really keeping one foot firmly planted in your single life or your current circumstances?

How would it feel to be all in?

How would it feel to be your own version of the Queen?

What would you stop tolerating and what is one action you could take that would be your Queen/King self leading?

Feeling brave? Leave a comment and share!

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I am an intuitive relationship coach and master energy healer whose mission is to help you trust and love yourself more than you ever have before…so you can attract that soulmate, land that great speaking gig or simply just stop second-guessing yourself when it comes to decision-making!

Click here to take me for a test-drive and book a complimentary 15-minute call where we can chat about your goals, I will help you get clarity on what could be holding you back and we can see if we are a good fit to work together to help you get there!

How to trust yourself after a betrayal (Q+A video)

Q: I was in a relationship and we just broke up. The guy cheated on me. I want to find love but I find it really hard to trust myself again. Is my intuition just bad? Help!

In this video you will learn:

  • The truth about our intuition that will free up any mental anxiety
  • A juicy question you can ask yourself to help you trust your intuition ASAP, especially after a betrayal
  • My good cop/bad cop response to cheating….with a healthy dose of love mixed in

Watch it now:

Q: Have you ever been betrayed? What helped you trust yourself in love again? Share with us in the comments below!

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this small shift can change your life…i’ve done the leg work for you!

Happy Tuesday!

How was your weekend? Did you do anything fun?

Quick update: I just got back home to the desert from New York City. Had a blast meeting with old friends and also clients who I’ve worked with on the phone but never met in person! Fun pic from my recent “Wealthy Goddess” event below with Lorena Morales! Also just kicked off my free 3-week video training series called “Live Like a Goddess!” Want to join me and learn how to receive? It’s not too late! Hop in here.

Can I share something really weird about myself with you that is the intro to today’s inspirational post?

Here it is.

I loooove…. pennies. 

In particular, finding pennies on the floor. I prefer the super new shiny ones, but the rusty, not-sure-i-could-give-this-to-a-cashier-it’s-so-covered-in-crap ones are cool too.

I get ridiculously excited and I sometimes squeal with delight when they make an appearance.

To me they are evidence that we are supported by the Universe.

They are a symbol of the energy of abundance, which to me certainly includes financial moo-lah but also love and our capacity to receive all the delights and desires of our Soul.

Since I got off the plane for my NY trip, I found a penny everyday, if not more than once a day.

Sometimes the Universe even threw in dimes!

Each time, even in a crowded subway or intersection, I would respond in the same way.

Delighted! Smiley! Filled with joy and with a big goofy smile on my face that I’m sure scared people (or disgusted them…or didn’t faze them..it’s NY after all).

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If you aren’t experiencing what you want in your relationship space, or in another area of life, consider that you may have put your focus on the wrong thing.

Example: When I kept finding those pennies and dimes, I was usually just in the present moment. Trying to find the right train to take so I wouldn’t get lost…again! Or looking for a sign or a friend who was meeting up with me. But in the back of my mind, I expected to find more pennies and dimes AND…I learned to stop trying to control when or how that would happen.

To test this theory out, for about ten minutes when I had alone time, I focused totally on pennies and dimes. I just knew I was going to find them. And I looked hard. Every sidewalk, my eyes scoured left and right, determined. I started to feel really tense and my breathing got shallow. I almost ran into a kid in a stroller I was so focused. And as you can probably guess, the result was no pennies or dimes. Just a whole lotta stress, wasted mental energy and a bruised toe!

I had a good laugh and then focused on the beautiful church that happened to be on my right. It was so beautiful and I sent a pic to my boyfriend.

And one minute later, there it was. Penny number two of the day.

So, in short here are this week’s action steps:

  1. Notice-are you operating from a space of knowing that you will have that hot relationship, etc but allowing your mind to come back to a space of ease, joy and the present moment? Or are you focusing so hard that you are creating negative things like stress, anxiety or worry? A simple awareness shift is all it takes to bring you back.
  2. One of my favorite mantras? “What I truly desires also desires me. It’s safe to let go.” Have a go with it. Say it aloud when you find yourself gripping  or write it out a bunch of times and notice how it feels!”

May you find many many “pennies,” and have a beautiful week!

Love and Blessings,

Diana

 ps: Want to learn how we can work together to help you make some powerful shifts in your love life and self-confidence? Hit reply and say YES and we can set up a time to chat on the phone for 15 minutes to see what option would be best for you!IMG_3336.JPG