Are your friends holding you back from attracting true love? 3 questions to ask yourself to do a “Friendventory”

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Q: I have people that I’ve been friends with for years and while they sometimes put me down, I feel bad if I say anything to them. I’m tired of being single and I wonder why I’m still alone. Any advice on what I should do?

A: This is an awesome question as it speaks to several areas that could definitely help you bump up what I call your “Sparkle” factor aka your relationship mojo.

 

In this video (5:42 sec) you will learn:

    • The top reason why you could be blocking love without even knowing it
    • Why it’s so hard to stand up to friends and how to know if you just need a boundary or whether you should say goodbye to them
    • 3 questions to ask yourself to do a “Friendventory” on friends that are dragging you down
    • oodles of love and encouragement from Diana

 

After you watch, be sure to post a comment to the question below!

 

Review:

3 questions to ask yourself to do a “Friendventory”

1) When you think about how you FEEL in your friendship, is it anything like I described with the chiropractor’s office next to Dominoes? Uncomfortable, icky or like you just can’t wait until you can be somewhere else?

 

2) So, ask yourself, “What’s the biggest price you’re paying by keeping these people in your life?” What is the payoff?  I understand you feel bad if you say something to them, but by not saying anything at all, you’re getting the short end of the stick and you’re saying that it’s okay for them to continue the behavior. Next, you have to look at the payoff. Even if you don’t think there is one, there ALWAYS is one. What do you get to AVOID looking at in your life? What would have to change in YOUR life if you didn’t have drama with your friendships or close associations?

 

3) Would you feel comfortable introducing your Mr. Right, fabulous guy to them?

If not, then you may have to have an uncomfortable conversation and wean them from your life to make room for people who love, respect and want to root for you! You deserve it Goddess! Thanks so much for asking this and keep us posted on what happens!

EXTRA FREE RESOURCE: 4-steps to having an uncomfortable conversation with anyone!

 

 

Your Turn:

Do YOU have a story about letting go of a friendship that wasn’t working? What helped you make the decision? Any advice or suggestions? Share by posting a comment below!

ps: Did you enjoy this post? Share it with your friends and subscribe for updates (it’s FREE) to get the latest tips and intuitive guidance on how to help you attract a FIVE STAR Love Life! You will also get my “Five Star Love Life Kit!” for FREE when you join!

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GET IT HERE: www.DianaDorell.com

This secret could score you admiring glances from that hot stranger…shhhhh

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Want to know the secret to receiving more compliments, unexpected gifts and yes, more attention from the opposite sex?The best part? It costs nothing and once you practice it enough, it will be become second nature.


I want to share it because it can also help you dramatically improve how you feel about yourself and consequently, increase the amount of positive attention and gifts you receive (sometimes from out of the blue, perfect strangers!)

 

Years ago, I tried it on my banker in California (shhh, don’t tell him!) and I actually was able to get a lot of annoying bank charges removed on my account and I think I said one sentence. That same day, I made sure I used the secret while walking on the street back to my house and even though I was wearing my ratty jeans and a tank top, I had more men staring and smiling at me than I thought was possible. (You know that feeling when you swear they must be staring at someone behind you so you try to be all cool, but then you realize, WOW, they really ARE staring at me?!) But the ultimate was when I used the secret and I got a phone call from a man that I was thinking about and obsessing when he was going to call me and voila, he called!

 

Now, of course everyone is different, but that’s just the tip of what is possible if you commit to using this secret.

 

The Secret: The Pleasure Vibe

There’s two parts to this secret. Part 1 is about YOU. Part 2 is about other people.

 

How it works:

Part 1 is about taking time to PLEASURE yourself every single day.NOTE: Now, to be clear, I’m not just talking about physical pleasure aka get out your vibrator, have crazy quickie sex etc, but that’s certainly one way to go about it. Pleasure is about any activity that activates your senses and is a personal ritual that you do for YOU.

 

This could be: reading a book in the park, taking a bubble bath, shopping at that vintage boutique you say you’re going to go to but never do, you get the picture. It’s non-negotiable time that is simply existing to pleasure and delight you. And you must do it EVERY DAY. It need not cost any money or take up your entire afternoon but it’s something that fills your cup up. See, when we take the time to consciously insert PLEASURE into our day, it actually sends a calming vibration to the brain and nervous system. It’s something to look forward to and while I’m not a scientist or a doctor, I know when I engage in it, my heart rate goes down, I feel lighter, saner and I come up with my most brilliant ideas. Because when you’re in pleasure or anticipating it, your energy is OPEN. It’s excited and BRIGHT. And that’s the SAME energy that attracts a man (or woman) worthy of your time.

 

So, what’s YOUR Pleasure activity? Write it down _____________________ .(You can probably think of more than that can’t you? Write the others down too!)

 

Part 2 is about consciously conjuring up pleasure feeling with other people in your everyday environment.

 

Now I know that sounded all witchy (conjuring is such a cool word!) but it’s never about manipulation. At all. It’s about choosing what to focus on in others and subconsciously, yourself. Because let’s face it. We’re all narcissistic and anyone we meet is simply a reflection of ourselves, or a part of ourselves that we recognize somewhere from some time.

 

How it works: Whenever you engage with someone, whether eye contact or conversation, pick ONE area of their body to appreciate. Like REALLY appreciate. Take it in. Let it fill your entire body for that moment. If you’re new to this, start with one person/day to get used to it. Or that really freaks you out, you can start by admiring a plant or a tree or a dog (hey, it’s all energy!) Be VERY specific. See, once you start sending out the “appreciate” vibe, the other person or thing 🙂 feels it and you will start to get that mirrored back to you. Mirrored back appreciation. Does it get any better than that?

 

An example from the bank in California years ago  (I can’t believe I’m sharing this!)

He was not that handsome. (I know, I’m direct.) He was a bit overweight and his shirt was kind of coming out of the side of his pants because it was too small. But I had picked him as my “pleasure” example to test the theory.

 

“So, what brings you here today, Diana?” He smiles really big.

 

“So, it seems that I have some charges on my account and I think they are overdrafts. Could you take a look and see if there’s anything you could do about that?”

 

“Uh, of course! Hang on just a minute while I pull up your account.”

 

<NOW>

 

Okay so now I consciously started to focus on one attribute which was his broad shoulders. They were very strong and I just kind of took them in. Mind you, I wasn’t staring at them. I just took a long glance and then kept appreciating them in my minds’ eye (I know, it sounds a bit strange but it’s what it takes!). Very strong. Solid. I felt my body tingle a bit. And I was smiling. At my purse.

 

And then I look up.

 

And he’s seriously grinning from ear to ear. His cheeks flush red and his fingers start stumbling on the keys.

 

“Uh, I’ll be right back.”

 

(Hmmm I wonder if he thinks I’m crazy? I thought)

 

A few minutes later, he returns and says, “I just spoke to my manager and he never reverses overdrafts, but he reversed all of yours. (He smiles goofily even bigger!) Is there anything else I can help you with? Would you like some coffee? Water for the road?”

 

(Oh my Goddess, it worked!)

 

“No, thanks! I’m walking. But thank you SO much for all your help!”

 

And I left, grinning from ear to ear. And I took a candy. It was my pleasure prize.

 

The bottom line:

Pleasuring yourself  and appreciating pleasure in others=increased happiness and unexpected returns. CLICK HERE TO TWEET THAT!

 

 

Your Turn: Leave a Comment + SHARE!

 

1. What’s YOUR pleasure activity? Name one that we can all share with each other to get ideas:

 

2. What’s one place that you will try this exercise this week? A park? At the grocery store? Report back your findings!

 

Did you enjoy this post?

Share it below and if you’re not already on the FIVE STAR LOVE e-list (it’s FREE!), pop in your email below to get your FIVE STAR LOVE KIT + weekly updates! 

 

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Are you a Jaguar or a Pick-Up? Get the male perspective on love right here

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  • Have you found yourself in less-than-ideal relationships?
  • Do you wonder if you’re doing something wrong and why you keep attracting less than what you want?

My client, *Andrew (name changed for privacy) shared some male perspective on this and his wisdom inspired me to write today’s blog post. Note: I have paraphrased and expanded on our conversation so that it is actionable and focused for you to read.

Diana: So Andrew, what piece of advice would you give to guys and gals out there who want to have an amazing relationship?

 

Andrew:  Ladies and dudes, you have to decide whether you want to be a Jaguar or a pick-up truck in a relationship. And guys, you have to know what kind of lady you are dealing with up front and be prepared accordingly. And it has nothing to do with what vehicle you actually prefer driving okay? I want to be clear about that. It’s a metaphor.

 

Diana: Um, okay, that’s very interesting. Can you elaborate a bit more on that please? What makes someone a Jaguar or a pick-up truck?


A: A Jaguar…

Okay, well, my girlfriend is super high maintenance and I mean that in the best way possible. She’s gorgeous of course, but she is high maintenance because she knows what she wants. And she has all these requirements about what she expects from me. And she calls me out on my shit when I mess up. It’s really annoying but I respect her for it.

And yes, she’s moody as hell sometimes but I put up with it because she always knows when she’s acting ridiculous and she’ll apologize and thank me for being patient and listening to her. And she’s incredibly generous. Sometimes she goes over the top with stuff like surprising me with little presents or crazy unexpected stuff. She listens to me and let’s me read comics even though she thinks it’s juvenile. But she requires a lot of attention. She’s a Jaguar.

 

Diana: Okay, so if I summarize, a “Jaguar” is someone who:

  • has requirements and standards and communicates that to others

  • calls people out when they’re crossing a standard or they aren’t being respected or treated well

  • incredibly generous and is attractive inside and out

  • requires a lot of attention but it’s well worth it!

 

A: Exactly! Okay, so then there’s the pick-up truck.

 

Diana: Yes, I can’t wait to hear this.

 


The Pick-Up Truck:

A: Okay, so if you or the person you tend to date is a pick-up truck, they are fairly low-maintenance. They don’t really ask for a whole lot and they have dents and bruises, maybe even lots of nicks on the bumper, but they’d rather just chug along than invest any money to get it fixed. They stay in the same beat-up, dangerous vehicle even though the light is on and there’s fumes coming out of the exhaust! Or worse, they try to do it all themselves and then what happens? One day they are on the side of the road in the middle of a rainstorm or something and the person they’re supposedly dating sees them… and keeps driving right past them!

 

In relationships, these are the people who just become doormats;  they just will give the guy or girl whatever they want without any thought to themselves or if it’s going to help them too. These people hate to be a burden but they always screw themselves and then wonder why no one wants to be with them for too long. I’ve been this guy and I’ve seen those kind of girl. It sucks!

Diana: Wow. That is pretty brutal but so true!

Andrew: I’m not really good at sugarcoating.

Diana: And that’s why you’re awesome. You just tell it to us straight. So, okay, let’s offer people some insight they can take-away from all this.

——-

3 TIPS for YOU!

So, based on what Andrew shared,  here are THREE tips I came up with for those of you who may find yourself more on pick-up side than the Jaguar side.

 

  • If what you really want is someone who is going to stick around long term, you’re going to need to be comfortable with saying NO to all the losers out there that you KNOW are not worthy of being in the same room with you. Just say no. And if you feel awful or guilty, let those feelings be there and say no anyway. You’ll feel relief and it gets easier!

 

  • The sex is never that good that it’s worth sacrificing what you really want-someone who truly loves you and is fine with all of you, even the parts you are embarrassed about.

 

  • Act like a Jaguar, even if you don’t believe you’re one. Fake it for awhile. It works!

 

Your Turn:

What do YOU think about the whole Jaguar vs. pick-up thing? Any advice you have for either “car?” Post your comments! Would love to hear from you!

 

ps: Did you enjoy this article? Please share it with your friends and sign up for weekly updates (it’s FREE) right here

 

3 tools to avoid naysayers and drop it like it’s hot anyway

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Let’s play a game. I call it “have you ever.”


Have you ever…

  • ever had some well-meaning person give you unsolicited advice about your life that left you feeling worse about yourself than before

  • ever doubted yourself and given into negativity and other people’s opinions about you

  • ever felt like you are in a room waiting for your life to start?

I’ve been there!

True Story:

With my orange tree. Mother Nature reminds me that we are ALL abundant!

With my orange tree. Mother Nature reminds me that we are ALL abundant!

I want to share a true story with you in the hopes that it helps you see that no matter what has gone down, there’s something that you have inside of you that trumps anyone’s opinion, your own fear and dare I say it, even your supposed “destiny.”


One of my secret (and not so secret anymore!) dreams has been to travel to Italy. It’s been an obsession of mine since I can’t even remember. I’ve never been there but you know how sometimes a place just calls to your Soul and you don’t know why? You may have grown up in a different culture entirely but still, it’s like this gnawing desire that grows stronger the older you get? That’s Italy for me. And now, many many years later, I am FINALLY going! It’s all arranged and for ten glorious days in June, I will be indulging in all things Italian.


And it’s funny. When I told people that I was going to Italy, most of them were like, “Oh my gosh! Italy is soooo beautiful! I went when I was younger. How romantic! You’re so lucky! I remember when….

And then after all the positive stuff wore off, they’d throw in, “But you know plane tickets to Europe in the summer especially are ridiculous, right?”

“I bet you can’t get time off from your job.

Well, you’re lucky you don’t have kids or a husband yet.”  (Uh…thanks?)


Talk about a downer on my dream. Other stuff that people said to me included:

“The men there are shameless flirts! You are going there by yourself? And you have a boyfriend back home? Watch out!”

 

 

When You Doubt Yourself

But the most interesting comment ended up becoming a big lesson for me in listening to myself. I was at an event in Los Angeles with two very well-known intuitives whose work I respect so much. We did a meditation exercise about Abundance and Joy. After that meditation, I ended up doodling a few things on my notepad, two of which were a heart and the word Florence! I hadn’t said a word to anyone and I got SO excited that I started sharing how I really wanted to go Italy and put on a workshop about love and intuition. The ladies at my table were so supportive and excited for me!


Anyhow, later in the event, there was a rare opportunity to stand at the mike and ask a question we wanted the intuitive“hits” on and I didn’t know what I was going to ask. I just wanted to ask something. Anything! (Looking back, I know that was probably my Ego talking and I could have just sat that one out, but there are no accidents!)


So I asked all smugly, “Would this summer be a good time to go to Italy? I really want to live there for a little bit and put on a workshop.”


There was a long pause. One said, “Oh no! You will have more money NEXT year because you will be in an “8” abundance year. Wait.”


The other agreed.“Your ducks will not be in a row if you go this year. You have to take care of the basics first. Wait until next year.”


“Well, alright then. Thank you.” I begrudgingly went back to sit down at my table and my good friend and founder of the Reinvention Channel, Vidette, who I introduced you all to awhile back slid a piece of paper across to me like we were in school.


It said, “Diana, why are you doubting yourself? Your intuition said Florence and you told me this summer. Why are you letting someone tell you otherwise?”


She’s an awesome friend and she was right. I love Vidette.


What Now?

But I shouldn’t shake what I had just been told. I tried to look at the situation objectively and rationally.

Side note: That lasted about two seconds because well, if you’ve ever tried to look at your own stuff objectively, it’s pretty hard to do. We want what we want! That’s why people hire me, so they get an outsider’s perspective when they can’t see through the fog of their own thoughts.


Here’s what mine were back then:

1. Yes, I do numerology too thankyouverymuch and I know that next year (2014)  the numbers show that yes, if I’m following my gut, abundance should flow pretty freely more than this year (yay!).


2.  But, I don’t care. I still want to go to Italy.


3.  I may not have all my ducks in a row, but I never understood that expression and frankly, I find it more satisfying to see what happens when there IS no row and the ducks are happy to go wherever they want to. What’s fun about being in a straight line?


ps: In case you didn’t hear me Spirit, I really want to go to Italy. Really badly. (Soooo rational, right?)


I got MAD and like I wrote about in an earlier post, I used that anger and later that insatiable DESIRE and asked myself, “If I didn’t care what ANYONE said and I had no fears about limitations on my time or resources, what would I WANT to do?”


The answer that came?  Use your travel miles, Diana and go to Italy.

My intuition directed me to the United.com site and I saw that I had 80,000 unused miles! It takes 60,000 to get to Florence, so there goes the “airfare is too much” objection . And soon after I booked my airfare (literally within 45 minutes), I found a beautiful room to stay in through a secure travel site and I also got a strong hit that I will be writing like a mad Goddess while I’m there. I am SO excited to be doing sessions with my clients from Italia over gelato! And the rest will figure out itself.

3 Golden Nuggets for YOU:


1) Your consistent soul-driven desires TRUMP everything else. Listen to them.


Even when you choose to cave in and NOT follow your intuition, your soul-driven desires nag at you in the middle of your workday, they pop into your head or your thoughts late at night or first thing in the morning. You may even get signals of other people doing stuff that reminds you of your latent desires that you’ve put on the back burner.


Let your soul-driven desires have a voice. Hear them out. They may have some pretty amazing plans for you that you couldn’t have thought up no matter how many psychics you went to or how many pieces of advice your friends or family members give you about what’s “for your Highest Good.” Listen. Stay open to their whispers.

 

 

2. Just START. You don’t have to have the whole plan. (Boring!)

You just have to know what you want and do the next immediate action. Then you get the next set of steps. Kind of like what happened with me. First, I had to negate my own intuition only to get mad at myself, which fueled me going to United.com, then to the travel site and finally I was so on fire that my creativity and intuition were doing the happy dance together.

 

 

3. Be Discerning. Naysayers are inevitable, but listening to them is a choice.

Most people are well-meaning and when you can remember that we’re all doing the best we can from our own unique life experiences, you can chill out and let the outside negativity or the fears that aren’t yours just slip off your aura. Replace it with compassion and loving detachment and do what you want to do anyway! (It’s more fun and takes a lot less energy!)

 

 

Your Turn:


Q: What’s a place you’ve always wanted to travel to? Why?


1. Post your answer using the “Leave a Comment” button down right!


2.  Did you enjoy this post? Sign up for updates (it’s FREE) right here: and join me over at my Facebook page here: www.Facebook.com/DianaDorell

 

 

3. Interested in learning more about what could be really be holding you back from what you want?

Fora limited time, I am scheduling 15 complimentary 30-minute “Sparkle” consultations with those of you who are committed to your personal development. These are conversations designed to SPARK you and help you learn more about yourself.

You are:

  • committed to learning more about yourself and have an open mind

  • open to receiving spiritual coaching and never blame anyone or anything for your current circumstances

  • an action-taker who has a desire to grow


Is that you?


Very very important: Read this before you say YES!


1) These are different than intuitive readings. The intention for these Sparkle consults are to help you discover what is really going on or blocking you from what you say you want in one area of your life. So if you come to this call wanting answers or wanting my “intuitive hits” on your life, I will kindly direct you back to my services page to book a reading. 


2) I will ask you questions, get to know you better and based on what we uncover together, I will make specific suggestions of ways that we work together to help you achieve your goals. This could be suggesting that you apply for one of my training or coaching program, consider a Soul reading or I may get a sense that a numerology report and an audio course I have would be of greatest benefit. It varies per person.


3) You also have time to ask questions about how I work and see if I’m the right person for you!


I am always amazed what happens in these Sparkle consults and I’m SO Excited to be speaking with fifteen beautiful souls.


Want to be one of my 15?

 

OOPS. Looks like I only have a few left! Book fast!

 

 


Go here

All my love,


Diana


www.DianaDorell.com

do you self-sabotage? the key to success most people ignore

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“Worldly success and Divine transcendence are NEVER mutually exclusive.”

-Kelly Cutrone author of “If You Have To Cry, Go Outside (and other things your mother never taught you)”

pinkchair

I used to believe that they were. I used to be afraid that if I ever met the right guy, he’d up and disappear as soon as I found out that I was psychic.

I’d fear that if I experienced a modicum of financial success that suddenly my intuitive gifts would vanish into thin air (poof!) or that I would be punished by the Gods (or Goddesses!)

And I’d fear that my insatiable desire to travel and see the world would ruin my potential to meet Mr. Right and have awesome friendships that filled me up.


brightandshinydiWhat really happened:

There were a few men I dated who thought what I did was weird but none of them actually left me because of my psychic gifts.  I have experienced financial success and my intuition is still intact and actually on fire (thank Goddess!). And I have traveled to several countries and all around the US and come back in one piece. While some of the jobs (and relationships) I had before I departed on my crazy adventures did occasionally end, it was never because of the travel. If anything, it brought me closer to the people in my life because it forced us both to prioritize communication and actually make time to reconnect!

I actually just manifested my VERY first trip to Florence, Italy for June (more on that next week) and the man I’m seeing is still with me and loving me for it, even though I’m leaving him alone for ten days to go off and be a crazy Dora the explorer. He says, “I’m glad it’s 10 days and not 3 months. You need to do this. Go. I love you.” That’s something I never thought would be possible through my old lens of how my partner “should” react. He’s teaching me a lot!


My point?

Your biggest fear realized will probably never come true.

Unless that’s your S.M.O (Spirit Modus of Operation).

But there is a HUGE difference between living your life in scarcity either-or land and  living your t life with a “BOTH” mentality. I can speak from experience because for the longest time I was in the former either/or and I know how hard life felt when I was in that space.

But when you live from BOTH, there’s a  huge difference in your happiness level. You have peace of mind. And yes, you naturally attract upgraded relationships and finances.

This “both” energy allows you to have a freakin LOVE affair with your life and the BEST love affairs that you read about in novels are never all one color are they?

They are passionate, wild, messy, inconvenient, heart-breaking at times and heart-opening at others.

They aren’t perfect.

But while you’re in the crazy love affair, it’s tantalizing, enjoyable, maddening all at once.

That’s what life is.

You deserve to have richness in the material world, whatever luxury your heart desires AND to be fully ALIVE and CONNECTED to your Spirit. To your Divine nature. On fire financially AND spiritually. On fire with your friendships or that hot man or woman in your life AND have a kick ass connection with your Spirit Guides.One without the other is just plain crazy-making in my opinion. It’s a life half-lived.



So, how do you make the transition from Either/OR to BOTH?


The answer?


You must learn how to develop, trust and act on your intuition. The most successful people I know trust their intuitive Knowing in EVERY area of their life AND they follow through on that intuitive guidance without question.If you’re new to intuition, it can be super hard to tell the difference between that wise voice and wishful thinking.

But it’s possible.



A tip:

Begin by noticing the repetitive nudges you get each day. Write them down in a notepad. Then ask yourself, “Is this true?” If it’s a green lights go feeling, you have your answer and you can choose to act on it or wait. If it’s not true, then move on. It’s not your intuition. Simple as that.


The bottom line: You CAN have both. It starts by simply believing that you can. Tweet that!


I believe in you.


YOUR Turn!


1. What is one book that has helped you believe in yourself?


2. Post your response using the “Leave a Comment” button down below right with the title or author!


3. Want to learn how to become an attraction magnet by simply using your Goddess-given intuition?


I’d love to show you how!


Extra Stuff For the Spirit-Driven Action-Taker


Here are 3 ways you can work with me no matter where you are on the journey:


#1 If you love stories and reading….curly up with my e-book “Six Success Secrets to Kick Ass in Your Life” aka Kick Ass Dancing Goddess:


#2 If you learn best through listening (audio)...take my audio course, “Find Your Spirit Realm, Find Yourself”


#3 If you’re ready for the ultimate Soul immersion and want to work with me 1:1, consider applying for my Soul coaching program here or booking a private reading here:


To your success with buckets of love and sparkles,

xoxo

Diana


ps: If you enjoyed this post, please share it with your friends and join the newsletter (it’s FREE) and you’ll get weekly updates from me to help you trust and love yourself.