Posts

Diana wearing a salmon shirt, taken 2022

Why It’s Hard to Really Be Friends With an Ex

Happy Tuesday! 

Have you ever been friends with an ex? 

It’s a tricky subject and one that I’d love to address today.

When I was writing my book, ‘The Dating Mirror: Trust Again, Love Again,’ there were so many dating experiences that presented themselves where I tried very hard to be friends with an ex. 

Clients ask me all the time when we start working together: “Are you going to make me cut off ties with my ex?!” 

As a coach, I can never *make* anyone do anything 🙂 Everyone makes their own choices and too choices lead to different results – I do find it interesting that I get asked that though, because it’s like at a subconscious level, they know something feels a little energetically ‘off’ about maintaining the same connection they have with an ex, however friendly. 

But let’s dive in… 

Here are 3 important reasons why it can feel really hard to be friends with an ex to consider: 

After you listen: 

  1. Have you ever tried to stay friends with an ex? If it worked, what are some tips that helped you? 
  2. If it didn’t work for you to be friends with an ex, what are some tips that helped you navigate that or end it? 

I would love to have you share your wisdom with the Goddess community by leaving a comment below! 

Diana wearing a salmon shirt, taken 2022

If You Struggle With The Whole Feminine/Masculine Energy Thing (Real Talk!)

Happy Tuesday! 

Truth: I used to be so confused by what it meant to be in your healthy feminine or healthy masculine energy.

All the material I was learning through the hard-knocks of dating and life taught me that I had no real clue how to operate in either healthy version fully.

Tried as I might, I felt like I was posturing, faking it and the whole thing just felt like some contrived way to manipulate prospective dates and the Universe to give me what I wanted, let alone if that thing was good for me. 

I set about to find my own expression of feminine/masculine even f it took longer than ‘5 simple steps to…”

It wasn’t until I began learning how to trust my intuition and consciously slowing down to listen to what my inner knowing and body was trying to tell me that this whole concept of masculine/feminine began to be more clear.

In a nutshell…

When I listened and received/captured messages and nudges from my intuition, I was in my version of healthy feminine.

When I acted upon the guidance my intuition was sharing and I knew I was sage to do so, I was in my version of healthy masculine. 

Here are a few things that have helped me to trust my intuition and a few that private clients have graciously shared too.

  1. Committing to the page…aka journaling.
    • I started journaling everyday and showing up to the page first thing, even when all I would scribble was “I have nothing to say. This is silly…” The more I made it a non-negotiable, I found that insights came, downloads for a lot, if not all, of the classes and speeches I would eventually share with audiences came out easily and I found that my nervous system was calmer throughout the day. 
  2. Drawing and doodling (especially great for those harder to understand emotions).
    • I have several clients who are professional artists and one shared that for her, what helped her to trust and relax into her true feminine, was ‘allowing all the pesky, hard, inconvenient emotions’ to express themselves on canvas or in a doodle. Music optional and you don’t have to be Picasso or spend a ton of money on supplies. A good ole’ fashioned pen and paper will do. Set a timer and pose the question-okay, emotions, what would you like to share? Then let your hand guide you around. Even if it’s just a few minutes. Notice what comes. 
  3. Let’s see what happens!
    • This one is more of a mindset. It can help you build the muscles needed for the inner masculine to feel safe to take action on your behalf. The more our inner masculine feels safe, the easier it is for other to also want to support us. So, the next time you get a nudge to do something, instead of shutting yourself down, consider saying aloud, “Let’s see what happens!” without any attachment to the outcome. Then, go take one simple action you’re feeling guided to. take, wit the acceptance and permission that it may not go anywhere, but you’re simply following your own flow. 

So there you have it! 

3 practices you can play with to start to trust your intuition and meet your own authentic Feminine and Masculine! 

Q: Which one will you play with this week? Leave a comment and share! 

PS: If you’d like to really sharpen your intuition and take it to the next level, check out the course, Bullet Proof Intuition! 

You can have a go at your own pace and I share the exercises I do often to help me stay on top of my own intuitive game. 

Diana wearing a salmon shirt, taken 2022

3 Signs He’s Just NOT Into You (Move On Alert!)

If you’ve ever been unsure if a guy was just not interested in you anymore, you may be avoiding seeing these 3 simple but clear signs. 

I know because I overlooked them myself!

In my best-selling book, The Dating Mirror: Trust Again, Love Again, I share personal stories from my own dating life and one of them was about a man who I went out with fa few times. We’d been seeing each other for about a month and I couldn’t figure out why things weren’t progressing. 

I kept doing everything possible to get clear answers but looking back, he was showing me all two of the three signs I’m about to share with you, but I just couldn’t admit that he just wasn’t into me. 

It was embarrassing and if I had listened to the signs, I would have saved myself a lot of time and energy! Watch below! 

  1. He hasn’t made any future plans with you (even after you’ve expressed that you had a great time and would be open to seeing him again.)
  2. He stops asking you questions/taking an active interest in communicating with you. He may answer questions you ask vaguely or not at all…
  3. He tells you! (But you’re in denial or you convince yourself it’s temporary, so you try harder).

The more that you can listen the first time when these signs present, the easier it will be to stop pouring energy into this connection, free yourself and create space for someone who is interested in you. 

No more second-guessing, wishing or wasting valuable time, goddess.

If you’re ready to move on and attract the love of your life, go here to schedule a complementary coaching consultation with me. 

Diana wearing a salmon shirt, taken 2022

My Favorite Mudra to Keep Your Energy Clean ASAP

Happy Tuesday! 

Have you ever felt energetically over-loaded on a date? 

Today’s Q+A time!

Today’s Q: “Diana, what is the best way to stay in your own energy in public places? I find myself over stimulated when I go on date where there are lots of people around. I’m an empath, no surprise, but am really curious, short of telling my date I would prefer to go to quieter environments, is there anything I can do in the moment to keep myself grounded?”

I love this question and as I was reading it, I was intuitively guided to share a Sudra I learned from Sedona many years ago. 

A mudra is literally a physical posture that you can do to support you with a specific intention-in this case, releasing any energy that is not yours.

It’s one of my favorites – watch below to learn it! PS: Check out my blast from the past hair! 

After you watch: Did you try it? How did it feel? Do you have any tips that have helped you manage your own energy? Share with us by leaving a comment! 

It’s Time to Take Back Your Personal Power!

Happy Tuesday! When it comes to your closest relationships, do you feel like there’s a healthy give and take? 

Are you always the one giving in for the sake of peace or do you feel safe to express yourself and voice your preferences? 

When it comes to romantic relationships, especially in the beginning, a lot of my clients have shared that they feel this unspoken need to prove themselves and “be enough” for that other person. 

You may feel pressure to do a lot of the activities that other person wants to do that you would never want to do on your own.

Or keep your mouth shut when something really bothers you.

All in the name of ‘keeping the peace’ and ensuring that the connection continues…

This can sometimes come from past relationships  where the power dynamics and boundaries/expectations were unbalanced (or in some cases, never solidified).

In healthy dynamics, compromise is natural. 

But when compromising comes at a cost to your personal energy, self-esteem and confidence. It can become toxic. 

It’s time to take back your personal power! 

In line with March’s theme of “personal power”, I’d love to share a mantra to help you feel more balanced in your relationships, especially if you have already identified that you have a tendency to hold back how you really feel and want to change that! 

Here it is: “The only person I have to be enough for is myself. It is safe for me to express who I am and how I feel. How others respond to that is out of my control.” 

When you remind yourself that it is safe to express who you are, you also give that other person unspoken permission to express who they are too, without all the pressure and filter of needing to be perfect. 

You create space to have more connected, meaningful communication with the people you love, because you aren’t trying to prove yourself. 

You already know you’re enough and that even if you have a different opinion than them, both of your opinions are valid. 

That engenders self-respect which leads to others respecting you and who wouldn’t want to be around someone like that? 

How to use it: 

In quiet moments where you feel fears rising up in your chest, close your eyes, take a deep, cleansing breath and say the mantra above. Say it three times with deep feeling. Notice how you feel. 

Will you play with this over the week and let me know how it goes? Drop a comment below!   

PS: Have you picked up your copy of the best selling book, The Dating Mirror: Trust Again, Love Again? If not, check it out here: https://dianadorell.com/shop/