Q: Diana, I was seeing this guy for three dates. I thought things were going great, but he hasn’t responded to my last text and it’s been almost a week. I feel like I’m going crazy-what is going on? What can I do?
It’s super frustrating when you text someone you really like stops texting you back.
It’s very confusing and even the most confident person can get thrown by the abrupt lack of communication.
Here are texting tips to help you stay sane when he (or she) isn’t texting you back:
- Avoid making assumptions. Don’t assume it’s about you. There are all sorts of reasons why someone doesn’t text back. Maybe they didn’t see it. Maybe they saw it and forgot about it or thought they responded and didn’t. And yes, maybe they saw it and did not want to respond, for a number of reasons. You are not in control of whether or not he texts you, but you are in control of the stories you tell yourself about what’s happening.
- Redirect your energy. Do something else. Even if you keep thinking about it, redirecting your energy will create space for you to calm your nervous system and perhaps, for him to text you back!
- Accept it. No response is a response. Accept it. You don’t have to like it but the sooner you can accept that you may never get a response, the easier it will be to move on. Actions (and in action) speak volumes. Trust that if you are meant to connect, you will and if not, then the Universe is doing you a favor and it’s time to let go.
- Resist the temptation to put him down or text him repeatedly to get a reaction. This will not bring him closer-if anything it will most likely push him even further away.Those are the actions of a little girl throwing a tantrum. You are a Goddess! Instead, you can write him a letter and burn it or even leave yourself a voice memo of all the things you want to say to him. Let it out in a healthy way and honor how you feel.
If he does text back and you feel upset….The Goddess way is to respect yourself-and if he does resurface, it’s perfectly okay to express concern or confusion, or to choose to not respond at all. Each situation is different. Your intuition will guide you to the right thing to do, but first get yourself in an emotionally neutral space. Get grounded. Breathe. Then respond (if you choose to) vs react.
It’s not easy, but the more you can implement the tips above, the easier it will be to manage your emotions when someone doesn’t text you back. Stay strong!
ps: Would you like to get support with a specific relationship? Book an Intro to Coaching consult to connect with me here.