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How to Decline an Invite From a Strong Personality (With Grace)

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Happy Tuesday!

Have you ever gotten repeated invitations from a friend or acquaintance and wanted to decline but didn’t have the words?

It can feel even harder when the person is what I call a “strong personality” and you may feel compelled to say yes, when you really want to say no.

Today, I’m taking your direct questions from the community and here’s the situation:

Q: “Diana, I have a friend who I met years ago at a business event. She keeps asking me to hang out in person, but I just don’t feel like it. It’s nothing personal against her, but I just have other priorities and I’m being super intentional where I spend my energy this year. I just keep saying, “it’s not the right time for me,” but she’s a strong personality and keeps pushing me to know why and proposes another date or question. I don’t want to be rude, and I don’t want to burn bridges but I don’t really know what to say so she “gets” it. Help!

A few things come to share with you!

1. Clarity is kindness. Q: What is it that you do want out of this relationship? Do you want to keep this person in your life but in a different capacity? Do you really want to not have any ties because it just doesn’t feel good or make sense? Be honest with yourself and allow all the feelings that arise to come up. That will inform how you eventually respond.

2. Ask yourself this: If the situation was reversed, how do you think they would act? This is more about getting curious. Chances are high that with a strong personality, if they didn’t want to hang out with you (or they wanted you to stop communicating), it would be very, very clear and there probably wouldn’t be a lot of wiggle room. So, ask yourself, what are you afraid of (if anything) could happen or how they would react if you were just really honest about what you wanted?

3. Once you know what you really want, and you’ve allowed the feelings and fears to surface and get to neutral, then you are ready to communicate neutrally and clearly.

Here are some potential responses (feel free to adapt/edit using your tone and what you want out of the relationship!): 

  • Brutal, but clear approach: Hey there-I appreciate you reaching out to hang out, but to be honest, I don’t have the bandwidth for that. If that changes in the future, I will let you know. Thank you for understanding and respecting that.
  • If you’ve identified you do not want a friendship but really want to help each other out in another capacity based on the event you attended: “Hi (x)-I am so glad we met the XYZ event years ago. If there is something specific I can support you with as far as business goes, feel free to email me and I will respond when I can. My calendar is super full right now for in person committments.”
  • If you do want to build/maintain friendship but just really don’t have the time or desire to hang out right now: Hi X, I really appreciate you consistently reaching out to connect with me. I realize my responses may have been a bit unclear-I truly value our connection and the truth is, right now my energetic capacity to hang out with friends in person is pretty low. It’s not personal-I just have other competing priorities at the moment. I am, however, available (if you really are!) to (fill in the blank-speak on the phone, text, etc). I understand if that doesn’t work for you, but I wanted to be honest and let you know where I’m at!
    The more you can practice being clear, getting to emotional neutral and communicating from that space, the easier it will be to deal with a strong personality (or any personality) and decline or accept invitations!

Q: Have you ever been in a similar situation? How did you handle it and what tips can you share around this? Leave a comment on the blog!

My Fave Self-Love Ritual – Happy International Self-Love Day!

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Happy International Self-Love Day (Feb 13!)!

Did you know that in numerology, the number 13 actually represents magic and alchemy? It’s a vibration that can help you transform any beliefs and ways of being that you know are standing in your way, especially around love!

One of my fave things to do on this day and actually this week especially is to block off time to do a self-love experience.

Regardless of your relationship ‘status’ creating a 5-star self love experience, even if it’s just for 15 minutes can have a really positive impact on your mental and emotional health, which impact the quality of your relationships and also level of self-confidence!

In this week’s short (but super powerful) audio, you’ll learn: 

  • top 3 elements you’ll want to include when designing a 5-star self-love experience (whether it’s the whole day or 15 minutes!)
  • the difference between being self-ish and self-love (this is often misunderstood, esp if you’re an empath like me!)
  • the benefits of a self-love experience that go way beyond the in-the-moment enjoyment and more!

Listen below:

Q: What are you going to do for your self-love day/hour/experience? Hit reply and let me know!

How to Sharpen Your Intuition Quickly (I Still Do This!)

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Happy Tuesday!

Do you tend to doubt yourself when you get a ‘gut’ feeling about someone or something?

I tend to work with a lot of high-achieving, high-performing women who have shared with me on more than one occasion that they want to trust their intuition more in relationships, but there’s a tendency to go into their head and try to “figure it out first.”

When I press on a bit more, they share things like, “It feels really frustrating to have to always figure it out, especially if I’ve had a rough day.” “I wish tuning into my intuition was easier-is there a way to just automate it?!!” (That one made me laugh, but I totally totally get this desire!)

This is completely normal-we are taught and even asked by society and especially in the business world, “What do you think?” first. It’s a reasonable question, but it takes you completely into your mental space before anything else, which overtime, can make it feel very weird and sometimes challenging to drop into your intuition and get more clarity.

It can bring up overwhelm, pushing and self-doubt.

So, in the spirit of keeping things very simple for maximum impact, if you’re serious about shifting this tendency to go up in your head and want to learn how to dial into a gut feeling or nudge or even deciphering an intense dream you had, do this instead.

Watch below (less than 90 second video!)

And after you watch, let me know in the comments or hit reply and tell him how it lands for you!

ps: If you’re wiling to stop letting your mind go into overdrive, check out my new meditation (totally free) to help you now if you didn’t see the other email: www.dianadorell.com/free-meditation

My Fave Way to Clear Negative Vibes Fast!

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Happy Tuesday!

One of the things I get asked a lot is how to clear negative energy.

Whether it’s just getting yourself out of a weird funk or releasing stuff you may have unconsciously taken on from that person at the grocery store, etc, having something simple and effective to do is key!

And to position yourself this year for high-quality relationships, massive abundance and more joy, having this tool in your back pocket is invaluable.

I use this tool a lot and if you’re an empath and particularly sensitive to other energies, you’re going to love this.

Watch below to learn it!

Have a great week and if you are ready to 10X your energy this year, consider booking a gold treatment! Check it out here.