Diana wearing a salmon shirt, taken 2022

Don’t Give Up – Go For 80, Yo!

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Happy Tuesday!

Today’s Q+A: “What advice do you have for those times when dating feels like a full-time job? I feel like I’m losing steam and getting so discouraged but I don’t want to give up on love. Help!”

I love this question…and before we dive in, I have a question: Have you heard of the 80/20 rule? 

It’s true in business. 

It’s true in real estate. 

And it’s also true in dating. 

It goes like this, using the business example:

80% of sales are made from 20% of the customers.

Those 20% are die-hard fans and they make up 80% of a store/product’s revenue.

That means that more than half of the people that enter a store on any given day will never, ever buy. 

Or buy sporadically when there’s a sale or something. 

But I digress. 

If we apply this to dating, it’s so easy to focus on the 80% of dates that suck, that leave you mystified with why there wasn’t a follow-up date or text or call. 

It’s easy to beat yourself up and want to throw in the towel, when really, if you reframe it-20% of those date will most likely be amazing. 

And…if we take it a step further, if you’re wanting to stay open to wonderful potential partners, what if you look for the 80% of what you love and admire in someone? No one, I repeat, no one is perfect and expecting 100% perfection will yield disappointment. 

Even if the date goes nowhere, putting your focus and lens on looking for what is interesting about someone, or what they are brining out in you is sending positive energy out towards them and yourself. 

And you’re more likely to notice when someone really is a great match for you. 

So…in a nutshell:

  1. When you feel low, remember the stats: Not every date will be a winner. In fact, 80% may suck. But 20% will be interesting and get you closer to who you’re meant to be with. 
  2. Stay open + focus on finding something interesting with every date you go on. You’ll have a lot more fun and who knows what magical opportunities could arise when you stay out of judgement and put away your long-ass requirements. 

Q: What do you think about this 80/20 rule? How has it showed up in your life? 

Leave a comment – I’d love to hear from you!

It’s an Island Ma’am (True Love Story)

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Aloha! 

Happy Tuesday, 

In the spirit of Valentines’ Day week, I want to chat about the E-word. 

Expectations…

On the one hand, expectations can help us clarify what we no longer wan to tolerate but taken to the extreme can create stress in relationships. 

I learned this the hard way on my honeymoon in Hawaii this past week! 

Listen below to hear my story! It’s my intent that by sharing this it empowers you to examine your relationship to expectation and deepen your connection to yourself and those you love. 

After you listen, I would love to hear from you-what resonated? Where could you benefit from more surrender?

Hit reply and leave a comment on the blog. I love hearing from you!

PS: Want to call in LOVE? Deepen the connection you already have? I’ll be hosting a LOVE Message Circle right after the New Moon on Feb 21! More details to come I the next few days to watch your inbox!

Being in Your Feminine is Not This… (Dating Advice)

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“I have to be in my Feminine to attract love right, Diana? So, why do I have to get specific?”

First off, you don’t *have to* be in any energy, but if you want to attract a primarily Masculine energy centred man, being in your authentic Feminine creates polarity, that sexual and energetic ‘tension’ that creates a romantic dynamic. 

Having said that, being in your feminine energy is never about being passive!

It truly drives me bananas when I overhear women encouraging each other to just “sit and wait” and not do anything at all to signal the Universe of their desires to be in partnership.

It’s a super delicate dance but here is one powerful thing you can certainly *do* while being in your Feminine energy that will actually help you attract romance without slipping into passivity…or over-giving. 

  • give yourself a weekly goal or intention. Notice I said give yourself (not the guy/girl). For example: Even though it felt weird at first, I asked one of my clients how many dates she would like to goon in the next week and she said “3” so she declared, wrote it down and even cleared out space in her week when she would be able to accommodate invitations. Within the next hour, a guy messaged her on Hinge and asked her out. They are going out this weekend. She was shocked. I was not. That is the power of declaring, being clear and creating space. 

Let’s break that down.

Step 1: She had to get clear.

How many dates? If she had been wishy-washy or passive like –I don’t know- however many the Universe wants to send me??? you can just feel the energy, right? Even writing it is like taking a super lukewarm bath-it’s not sexy and it’s not magnetising. IN order to get clear, she had to do gut check and/or body check-yes, maybe her head said she wanted 5 dates, but when she checked in with her body, she realized she only had energy available for 3. Take the time to slow down and get clear. 

Step 2: She wrote it down and made space in her schedule. 

She actively participated in the creation of her desire. If she ha said 3 dates but refused to block off or identify time when she could actually meet those men, she may have still called in those dates, but she could have been unnecessarily stressed or felt like she was overbooking or compromising in another area. Q: What needs to be cleared or sifted so you can actually receive what you’re for? 

Step 3: She stayed open to how and when. 

Sure, the intention was for the week, but she let go and trusted that she would receive feedback from the Universe via people at the perfect time. And she did! She wasn’t trying to control when it happened or how it happened. So she was a safe receiving space for it to come to her! 

The more you can actively practice these 3 baby steps, the easier it will be to stay constantly in your Feminine, without slipping into passivity and wondering why nothing it happening! 

Q: Which of these 3 steps do you need to practice? Hit reply or leave me a comment on the blow and let me know! 

ps: Who is coming to Hollywood this 11:11? Join me for my Winter Retreat! There’s still time to sign up! Click here

How to Have a Happy Relationship (5 Secrets from Happily Committed Couples!)

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Happy Tuesday to you!

Can I share some exciting news before we get into today’s post? 

This weekend I am getting married to my love!

If you’ve been following me for a while, you know it hasn’t been an easy road to get to this point!

I’ve had my heart broken, more than a few times.

I’ve broken hearts without meaning to.

I’ve doubted that I could ever love again or that maybe I was just too much for someone. 

I’ve feared letting someone in-what if they saw something they didn’t like and leave? 

So many things, Goddess!

But what I do know (OMG I channeled Oprah just then!) is that a ‘happy relationship’ is something  that can be cultivated. 

Once your inner ‘house’ is ready to receive another person and they you, there are things you can do to maintain a level of balance and happiness in your partnership.

And by the way, what I’m about to share also applies to friendships and other relationships too!

Here are 5 secrets to a happy relationship:

For more secret nuggets, watch the video but here is the quick cliff-notes version:

  1. Calendar ‘couple time’
  2. Find something to appreciate about the other person daily-and express it.
  3. Maintain your personal joy (don’t stop doing the things that make you happy). Be responsible for your own happiness.
  4. Make each other a priority.
  5. Explore professional support to make the relationship stronger.

ps: Want more support? Schedule a private, complimentary Into To Love Consultation here!