3 tips to survive the holidays as an empath

Happy Wed and if you are in the States, Happy Thanksgiving week!

I know the trend is to write about gratitude and giving and all that jazz, but one of the things I don’t feel gets addressed enough during the start of the holiday season is…

how to deal with emotional shiz that comes up during said holidays.

It can be a really triggering time if you feel different than your family of origin or have to be around folks that you don’t normally spend time and energy with.

I remember dreading going to a get-together with old friends from my past because I couldn’t relate to their lives.

I don’t have a mortgage. (yet…working on that Universe!)

I don’t have kids. (I mean, human kids-sorry, Bella!)

I don’t work a regular 9-5 gig with two-week vacation and stock options, etc.

Nothing wrong with those things at all.

But I felt the stuff I was excited about-personal development, this cool crystal I just got…ideas for a second book and how to curate a fun bi-coastal laptop lifestyle with my partner and our fur babies well just…didn’t compute. 

I got a lot of odd smiles and awkward silences. 

So I’d downshift into small talk and excuse myself to the ladies’ room for the third time, feeling drained and annoyed.

It was really triggering.

And as an empath and an ambivert, I flip flop between wanting to be around people and wanting to hole up in my Goddess cave and tune out the noise of the outside world.

Can you relate?

If you have often wondered about opting-out of the holidays or feeling anxious about how to not energetically burn-out during the season, good news!

I’m currently creating a course for you fellow empaths (stay tuned!) but, here are 3 of my favorite tips to prepare yourself!

1. Take control of the conversation.

I know-super counterintuitive for introverts. 

But if you’re around people that you have no idea what to say to, or if you have awkward silences and don’t want to deal with a lot of questions directed at you, ask this question: 

“So…what’s something you’re excited about right now?” 

The brain is trained to answer questions, so this question really sets the stage for interesting conversation and forces the other person to think and then talk (yay, not having to talk!).

2. Wear or carry around some hematite or black obsidian.

Yea, I’m all about crystals! These two can be found in any metaphysical store and having them near your person blocks out negative energies and helps you from feeling drained. I keep ’em in my bra if I’m going into a really unpredictable space…or you can just have it in your pocket or as a necklace/bracelet. 

3. Have an exit strategy.

I realize that if you’re not in your normal city, this could be hard, but one thing that works when I need to excuse myself is to say, “I need to check on a friend right now. Please excuse me.” 

And I really do schedule time to text or call a friend! It could be to just say hello. But you’re still in integrity and you never have to stay in any situation that feels draining. 

If you can make a date with them or yourself at a local bookstore or grocery store (heck, I’ve been known to go there just to read magazines and buy chocolate when I need a break!), do it! Take care of you.

The more you can follow these 3 simple but effective tips, the more fun the holiday season can be and who knows, you may actually find some interesting connections you couldn’t see before when you guard yourself or dread the occasion!