Ever feel afraid that you’ll be “off” Purpose if you fall in love? 4-step process to help you!

One of my clients shared a very interesting dilemma she was having. One of her heart’s desires in addition to finding a spiritual soulmate was to write her first book to help children make their way in the world. She had been really procrastinating on it and the convo basically went something like this:

The Convo:

Her: “Diana, I am so proud of myself! After our last session, I actually created a writing schedule for myself. And I’m actually sticking to it! I wrote for 2 hours yesterday and it felt so amazing!

Me: That’s awesome! So, what’s the problem?

Her: “Well, I really want to be a relationship right now, and every time I seem to meet someone, I fall for them fast and end up just not making time for writing at all. It’s like I just put all my focus on them. I just met someone I really like…and I’m terrified that I’m just going to stop writing again and that I’m not going to live my Purpose and then I’ll just hate myself. What should I do?”

Hmmmm…very interesting indeed.

  • Have you ever struggled with giving all your creative Life Force energy to someone you just met

  • Ever worried about not fulfilling your Life Purpose because of a new (or existing) relationship?

  • You’re going to love today’s post!


Below, I break down:

  • The real issue that was keeping this woman (and possibly you) stuck +how she got out of it

  • The immediate next step to take if you find yourself going down this train of thinking

  • A Soul power thought you can use to stay aligned with your Purpose AND love


Part 1: The Real Issue (What I shared with her)

A: Okay, what could be going on here is that there may be a part of you that believes that to truly have abundance and flow in one area of your life requires that another area has to sacrificed or compromised. In this case your commitment to your writing/Purpose. It’s about reframing it from an  energy of “I have to have either/or to I totally and completely will create both/and.”

Second, you say, “I just put all my focus on them..” and then what happens? The relationship eventually ends, right? (she nodded and I went on..) because let’s face it, no one wants to be the sole focus of your attention 24/7. It creates an imbalance and what you’re really after I’m guessing is someone who adores you and actually inspires you/you inspire, right? So then it just becomes a matter of balancing out the distribution of energy you’re giving and energy you’re receiving.


Part 2: The Discovery

She coughed a few times. A great sign that her throat chakra, which rules communication was opening!

We did some major energy work around this as this “either/or” energy had been with her since she was a childhood (and honestly probably before that too). She experienced a huge release and we put together a simple action plan that allowed her to create specific blocks of time for her writing, the language to use when she found herself getting invited to activities with this new person who conflicted with that block (having the language for it is huge!) and she even came up with her own mantra to tell herself when she started falling back into the old fear.


Part 3: Your 4-Step Action Plan!

1. Notice

Where are you engaging in either/or thinking or behavior in your life right now? What are two areas that are really wanting your attention? Scan the core areas of your life and write it down.

2. Breathe

When you go into scarcity thinking, stop and take a deep breath. With each inhalation, visualize yourself receiving more of what you want. And on every exhalation, visualize yourself giving out love to the world from your new abundant state. It will take you to a different head-space.

3. Soul mantra it:

Say aloud, “I can now have both. It is safe for me to have both. Creating both helps me and the people I care about.” (This activates your subconscious but it also makes it about how this new thought will positively impact your relationship to others and how they view you too!)

4. Schedule it

Look at your calendar or sheet of paper. Where will you now make time for the things that keep falling to the wayside that are important to you? For your Soul Purpose-activating activities. These don’t have to be broad-sweeping business plans. I’m talking small steps. Example: Maybe from 1-2pm on Mondays you will commit to researching experts in the field in which you want to be in. Or you will look at going through your closet and putting together an outfit that is date-worthy and represents who you really are now!


Q: What is ONE thing you are going to do this week to move into a place of balance between your relationships and your Purpose? Share your Step 4 if you feel moved!

ps:Diana Dorell Red Pic Want to stop your monkey-mind chatter that’s keeping you from making an important decision around a relationship or your business/career? Sign up for my Intuition 101: How to Master Decision-Making course that kicks off June 2!

Intro rate ends TONIGHT at 12midnight PST.

Go here to join us:

0 replies

Leave a Reply

Want to join the discussion?
Feel free to contribute!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *