can I assert myself + still be feminine?

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Happy Wed!

How are you?

It’s Q+A time!

Today’s Q+A from our community: “Diana, I struggle with feeling comfortable asserting myself and standing up for myself. I’ve been told that that’s not “feminine” and I am trying to be more in my feminine to attract a soul mate relationship. Can I do both? Where should I start? Help!”

This is such a great question! 

There is such a balance between wanting to be “feminine” and also respect yourself and voice how you feel/what’s okay and not okay.

We’ve been programmed by society, the media, well meaning friends and even family on how to be the ‘right’ kind of woman to attract a soul mate. And it can feel hard to know what “both” looks like.

But there’s a question underneath the question that you need to look at first…

Disclaimer: I recorded this after a meditation out in nature, so if my voice sounds a bit stoned, (I’m not) that’s why! 🙂 Bonus points if you can hang until the end to hear the adorable birds! 

Click below to listen to the audio.

Love and Blessings,
Diana

you know more than you think you do…

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So often we say “I don’t know” when asked about what to do in a certain situation.

But the truth is, we always know something.

Sometimes we only know a piece of information and we need to ask more questions.

Other times, we know but we wish we didn’t because once you know something, well you can’t “unknow” it, right?

It takes courage to take responsibility for what your intuition is guiding you towards…and then to act on it.

This could be in a relationship, a career situation, or even with your own health.

Intuition works in steps.

You aren’t always given the staircase and until you fully commit to the next step, you won’t see or recognize the next one.

A great 3-step process you can take yourself through when you are faced with a challenging situation in any area of your life is this:

Step 1: Get grounded.
My favorite thing to do is dance in my living room to Spotify.
A brisk walk or standing barefoot in grass or being in water also will do the trick.
Is it cold where you are? Take a shower-that will do it too!

Step 2:  Ask on paper: “What I already know about this situation is….”
Drop into your heart. Take some deep breaths and do some free writing. Go until you feel empty.

Step 3: Ask, “Is there any action I could take NOW to move the situation forward?”
Sometimes you will get a no. It may just be time to have awareness and let things be. But other times, you’ll get a nudge to call this person/go to this event/etc. Follow your nudgings.

Revisit this process as many times as you want when making a decision.

You know way more than you think you do and the more you practice, the easier it will be to move out of the “I don’t know” phase and create powerful decisions that empower you and and get you closer to where you want to be.

Love and Blessings,
Diana

 

ps: Are you coming to Sedona?

I am so excited to be hosting a super intimate, end-of-year retreat under the stars in Red Rock country!

Click here to check it out

your 3-card intuitive message

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Happy Wed and October!

Hope is in the air! As we begin the month, it’s so important to take stock of how far you’ve come-no matter what challenges may have arisen last month, it’s the perfect week to take the lessons from before and apply them to your deepest desires.

As it relates to relationships, a lot of old relationships from your past may come up for review-in some cases, it may show you how much you have grown as your response to old triggers will be much different than it was before. In other cases, it will show you where you have some unfinished business with another and most likely is there to show you what’s really, really important….and what’s just not anymore so you can move forward.

I pulled three cards for you to anchor in this week:

  • This week’s theme: water the seeds you’ve planted. 
  • Message: A cloud lifts and forward movement is happening! 
  • As you draw strength from your past and put energy into your hearts desires, you will begin to reap the rewards of your hard work and clear intentions!

All in all, October will be an excellent month, ripe with possibilities and breakthroughs if you remember that any emotions that come up are there to benefit you!

ps: Are you coming to Sedona?

I am so excited to be hosting a super intimate, end-of-year retreat under the stars in Red Rock country!

Click here to check it out:

Love and Blessings for a beautiful October,
Diana

the one reason most people don’t manifest what they want in life

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A question I get asked a lot in media interviews is “what is the # tip you have to help people manifest the relationship and life they want?”

The answer (inspired by the scene in Crazy, Rich Asians movie) is found in observing the following question.

In any given situation, are you playing to win or are you playing not to lose?

If you’re playing to win, that looks like:
:: feeling scared but going all in anyway, knowing that everything worth going for is going to require some element of risk
:: clarity on what you desire but flexibility on how you get there
:: making mistakes but course-correcting along the way, focused.
:: this is the big one….being willing to be wrong, surprised and delighted, willing to leave blood on the stage with your efforts (yea, I know that’ kind of gross but it’s a theatre term I had to throw in there)
:: based on an abundance/more than enough mentality, let’s see what happens vibe that encourages exploration, creativity and curiosity

If you’re playing not to lose, that looks like:
:: feeling scared and not going in all the way, actually not really even going fully for it at all. 
::it’s an idea that lives in your head, but there’s no action behind it. it’s a fantasy.
:: doing the bare minimum to yield minimum results (a safer bet, but not really rewarding or satisfying).
:: based on a lack/scarcity mentality and encourages fear and defensiveness and not enough-energy

That’s it.

You want to manifest the exceptional relationship, career, house, etc?

Play to win.

If you don’t, you ‘ll always feel this restlessness knowing you could have gone further, gone for it, expressed how you felt, whatever the next right action is even if you’re not 100% sure it’s going to lead you to X result. 

The next right action is inspired by your gut.

If you want to play to win, you must learn how to get out of your head.

The head will cut you off at the knees before you’re even out of the starting gate.

The heart will let you know how you feel, which is important but can also slow you down when shit gets hard or you’re in uncharted, uncomfortable waters.

But the gut?

The gut is pure. It is emotionally neutral. 

Even when you’re taking scary actions and the mind won’t shut up, it’s there for you, that quiet whisper that says….keep going.

Q: Where are you intending to play to win in your life? Leave a comment and let us know!

how to push through resistance (one question)

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Facing resistance?

Whenever you are taking action in the direction of your dream, whether that’s manifesting a great relationship or doing that thing you always wanted to do but were scared to, resistance will rear its lovely head.

Our primitive brains hate any kind of change and any suggestion outside the lines of our normal patterns will set off this alarm bell “Danger, danger, stay away!” and it can be so easy to just slip back into what’s comfortable.

But if you’re reading this, that tells me that “okay” is not good enough.

You want awesome!! And you want it like yesterday, right?

So, then resistance is something to make friends with.

Instead of running from it (which never works, been there, done it, got the T-shirt) you can ask yourself this one question to tame it.

Q: What would the version of me who already has the thing I want do/not do / say/not say / respond/choose right now?

It feels a bit like make-believe but who cares? I always say, do what works and heading into a space of possibility helps quiet that freaked out part of your brain that becomes hyper focused on keeping you safe and exactly where you are.

Play with the question above. Journal on it. See what comes up.

The more you can become emotionally neutral to the primitive brain and instead consciously redirect and co-create your next moves from your future self, the easier it will be to get there.

And also hold onto it once you manifest it!

Q: Are you willing to give the question above a shot this week? share with me in the comments!

ps: Want to come to Sedona this winter with a super intimate group of kick-ass Goddesses committed to releasing the old and resurrecting their inner bad-assery and personal power? 

Click here