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When you have to make a decision, it can be really hard to tell whether it’s the right one. Especially if there is a lot riding on the decision, we can easily downshift into fear because well, we need to make some decision, don’t we?
But there’s a huge difference between making a decision from fear and making one from inspiration.
Here are some clues to tell:
Fear looks like:
-feels heavy in your body, and you tend to be in your head trying to figure out all the reasons it can’t come together or that it will be hard.
-the decision moves you away from something you don’t want
-making a move to defend against an outcome that hasn’t happened yet (based on the past usually)
Inspiration looks like:
-feels light in your body, even if you’re not sure how it will all come together
-the decision moves you towards something you want
-making a move from a desire or curiosity based on who you want to be (not who you were or what current circumstances show you are possible). There’s still a desired outcome (we are human!) but you trust that whatever happens after taking this inspired action will be in service to your growth and your Path.
An example of this when it comes to relationships and taking care of yourself:
You have a date with someone and text them to confirm the night before.
You haven’t heard back from them within the hour, so you cancel the date before they do.
(because that’s what always happens before, so why not beat them to it?)
You have a dinner date with someone and text them to confirm the night before.
You haven’t heard back from them within the hour, so you make a decision within yourself. You will reach out to them one last time in the morning and if you don’t hear back by 12noon, you will just make other plans. No biggie. Your time is valuable. There will be other dates with people who value it.
Do you see how one puts you in the victim role and one puts you in the driver’s seat?
It’s never about the other person, although that’s the easy thing to do!
The more you can check in with your own intuition before making a decision and ask, “Hmmmm, could this be coming from fear or inspiration?” you will save yourself a lot of time and energy!
Stay tuned because next week I will be sharing more self-care and love tips to help you understand what you need as a unique Soul to stop sabotaging. I’m really excited to share this groundbreaking work with you.
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When your mind is worried about something, it’s next to impossible to stay open to love, because part of you is already checked out of the present moment.
With so much happening in your daily world, it’s easy to get bogged down by details and forget to take care of your Spirit and own your time and energy.
Here are 3 of my favorite rituals to free your mind and help you reclaim your energy:
1.Start with “Thank you”.
This sounds so simple, but notice how you feel when you say Thank you when you first wake up. Say Thank you when your feet hit the ground after you get out of bed. Say Thank you and take a deep breath. Before checking your Twitter feed, email pings or anything else outside of yourself in those first five minutes. It sets the tone for the rest of your day. If you don’t put yourself first, how do you expect others to? Thank you.
- The Nightly 3
Before you go to bed each night, write down the 3 most important things that you need to address for tomorrow. Nothing else gets added to your schedule until those top 3 are looked at. (That last step is key and you will be tempted to not do it!)
A mentor of mine gave me this exercise for my business and although I don’t always do it (I’m human!) I notice a huge boost in my productivity and energy level when I do. Being unfocused takes way more energy than taking a few minutes to prep before.
- Use the worry box.
I’ve written about the worry box before, but there’s a reason I keep sharing it with you. It really works! Get an empty tissue box, index cards or post-its. On the box, write a prayer that everything that goes in the box, you are giving to Spirit to transmute and deal with. It’s being handled as Olivia Pope would say. Whenever you have something you keep worrying about, write it on the card and drop it in. Say your own version of the prayer, “Thank you Spirit for taking this off my heart and mind. Show me any right actions to take. I free and release these to you. Thank you! And so it is!” BOOM! Done. If you want to worry about the situation again, you have to go into the box and dig out the index card.
Which one of the 3 will you experiment with this week? Share with us in the comments!
Ps: Are you into Angels? Have you been wanting to feel more connected and clear around a situation in your life? Sign up for the Intuitive Angel Night happening on July 6!
The Universe wants to support you 100%.
It has no agenda.
It has no opinion.
It merely matches your dominant vibration and says, “Okay-let’s give you more of that!”
It wants you to be as joyful, happy or miserable as your frequency emits.
It is always listening.
And when it comes to finding love and having harmonious relationships, there are 4 core sabotaging behaviors that repel love from staying and keep you stuck in all areas of your life.
For each I have given you a specific example of how this could play out in real-life and what the Universe really hears when you exhibit each behavior.
Heads up: Be gentle with yourself as you read this. If you recognize that you have been engaging in one or more of these behaviors, simply notice what comes up. Acknowledging it is the first step to changing it.
1) saying you want something and doing the exact opposite
Ex: Saying you want to be a committed relationship but having regular sex with your ex who has made it clear he is seeing other women.
Universe hears: “You value no-strings-attached relationships so we will send you more people who also value that.”
2) thinking thoughts and taking actions that are divided-some are in alignment with what you declare and others are aligned with the opposite (talk about mixed messages to the Universe!)
Ex: If you desire to have relationships that are a two-way street where you feel respected and cherished, maybe you have a difficult conversation with a good friend about feeling like you aren’t always able to vent to her but at the same time, you are tolerating less-than-respectful behavior from a co-worker and not saying anything about it.
Universe hears: “You like getting the short end of the stick and being disrespected. We will send you more of that.”
3) breaking your commitments (to yourself and to others)
Ex: You make an appointment (with anyone from your mother to a business associate to your dentist) and you either don’t show up at all or cancel at the last minute because something else better came along.
Universe hears: “Your word and other people’s time are not important, so we will send you people who also don’t value your time and word.”
4) Ghosting aka giving off “avoidant” vibes
Ex: This one is pretty self-explanatory, but this can look like anything saying yes to a date and never answering any texts or phone calls to confirm where you’re meeting to getting an email from your boss and being too chicken to say how you really feel, so you just send it to the trash, hoping the issue will just magically disappear. Only it comes up again and again, usually in another relationship.
Universe hears: “You like to play games and you like to be chased more than you want to have a real relationship. So we will send you people who play lots of games with you too!”
Why we continue these sabotaging behaviors:
- Fear-that we are going to make the wrong decision. So we don’t make any, which is a decision in itself.
- Fear of taking full responsibility for creating our life. If we don’t decide, it’s “someone else’s fault.” And we are off the hook. Only you’re not, because you co-create your reality with the Universe 24/7 so this leads to feelings of helplessness and a lack of confidence, two energies that repel quality relationships.
- We are terrified of actually getting what we want! What would have to change if you welcomed in that soul mate today? Asked for that raise? Told your sister to take lay off you on X topic already? Change can feel scary, so we default to what keeps the very thing we want at bay.
Q: Which of the four behaviors speak to you to shift in order to have more of what you want-happiness, joy, inner confidence and love?
Share with us in the comments!
Ready to get unstuck and stop sabotaging your success and confidence?
Fact: No matter how many affirmations you do, or how well intentioned you are, having a doozy of a day is bound to happen every now and then.
Being on the spiritual path doesn’t mean you won’t ever encounter sadness, anger or rage. Or crappy experiences. Or your own negative self talk.
Quite the contrary actually.
I work with highly intuitive, successful clients and the further they go on the spiritual path and peel back the layers of crap that kept them from fully experiencing a high-quality relationship and optimum self-love, the greater their sensitivity and more finely-tuned their intuition gets.
Which is awesome and with that, comes an increased level of responsibility for taking care of your energy and knowing how to pull yourself out of a rut/self-soothe!
So, on the days where your energy is a bit lower than normal and you are particularly sensitive to the vibes of the people around you, it’s more important than ever to
a) give yourself permission to move through tough moments. Feel the feelings, rage, cry, let.it.out in a wild dance or howl (brownie points if you don’t live in a city like NYC where no one really gives a rats as& if you howl in public!)
b) Give yourself permission to tell your Ego to take a hike…before it tries to take you into a downward spiral, telling you a story of why you aren’t good enough/worthy enough/deserving enough/how the Universe doesn’t really care about you at all/etc etc (insert any other super victim-like thought here).
See when you distill it down to the simplest form, getting yourself out of an emotional hole is all about the story.
And in any given moment, you can ask yourself:
c) “Is the story I’m choosing to believe right now about myself supportive or destructive, given what I really really care about?” If it isn’t, then say, “Thank you very much, but we already read that book. NEXT!” And find a new story that is supportive.
Just even asking the question above can take you out of your head and back into what is important to you, without all the judgement, emotion and energetic haze.
Now over to you: which of the 3 steps (a, b or c) are you open to playing with this week? Share with us in the comments and have a fantastic week!
Ps: Do you know you have some crap to clear that’s holding you back? Join the Summer of Love healing series, going on all June ! It is free and our 2nd call is this Wed! A replay of the 1st call is available so you can catch up and listen.
Sign up here: https://dianadorell.lpages.co/hyh/