Have you ever had one of those days where you can’t seem to get anything done because you’re obsessing about something that happened…or someone?
Maybe it was a conversation, lack of communication, miscommunication or just plain ghosting!
It can be really difficult to get past the mental and emotional clutter but there is good news!
It’s not impossible.
By engaging in three very simple daily practices, you can begin to clear out the clutter, increase mental clarity and be more in balance with your emotions.
*Funny note: ironically, today’s tips were actually inspired by a dog that I sat for awhile ago.
His name is Andre.
I dubbed him Andre the Giant even though he is a tiny chihuahua.
Here are the 3 practices to incorporate daily into your life..
#1 Play with Purpose
At any given moment, he would go into a spastic “Happy Dance” where he’d wiggle his little body, bury his nose in the blanket and roll over with a satisfied grunt. Then he’d proceed to run around my entire home with his stuffed baby elephant until he was complete. It was pretty amazing to watch and I couldn’t help but get in the game and play with him. I got so much done after that!
YOU: In all your relationships, could you commit to making some time each day to just play without agenda or purpose?
Example: Do a video conferencing wine night with all your girlfriends who live out of state, tell a silly joke or story and ask your partner to share one too, tickle your lover, etc! When we can play, we up the fun factor and the energy you give off is attractive, open and expansive.
2. Kiss and Make Up
Andre chewed a corner off my current favorite hardcover book and I was livid. Fuming. And with tail between his legs, he knew Auntie Diana was not happy.
So I did what a lot of us adults do when we’re mad in relationships.
I ignored him and pretended like everything was fine. (A truly passive aggressive, confusing combination to the other party in our lives!)
And inside I felt like I was going to burst.
His ears perked up and he promptly climbed into my lap and started kissing my arm. When that didn’t work, he started kissing my knee.
And when I still wasn’t looking at him, he went for it and started kissing my big toe, which made me burst out in laughter! I said, “Andre, I am very mad at you right now. Never touch my books again, especially if they are on the floor. But I love you and thank you for the kisses.”
Message received. All my books are intact to my knowledge and the kisses keep coming.
YOU: Instead of holding your emotion in, how would it feel to let it out in a creative way for a change? Could you communicate clearly what it is you’re feeling, without trying to “make it right” or avoid personal responsibility?
A good formula that works:
- State your feeling in the moment, not the past (I feel…right now).
- State what you want to see change (be specific and don’t blame).
- End with an authentic compliment (I love you, I appreciate you for ___, etc).
3. Embrace the power of stillness and space (aka do nothing) everyday.
Andre has no problem sleeping all day and bouncing from fuzzy blanket to stuffed pillow with stretch breaks in between.
It was actually amazing to me and sometimes as I was working in my home office, I literally would forget he was there because he was sleeping like a cat, quiet as a mouse, content to do nothing at all.
No apologies. No sneaking around like he was being “productive.”
Just full-out lazing about. It was really quite admirable and I found myself feeling envious, so I did a little experiment.
Instead of darting to my computer right when my eyes opened, I took a bubble bath.
And just sat there in the tub. Closed my eyes. Listened to Pandora and just splashed about without any cares.
For like 30 whole minutes (I have to start small right?). Then I made some fresh juice for myself and petted Andre, who was happy to see me adopting his pampering, guilt-free attitude!
All this happened before 11am. After that, the shit I was obsessing about the night before stopped and I got a day’s worth of stuff done in literally 3 hours.
But that wasn’t all.
I heard from the guy that I’d be obsessing about that I thought had dropped off the face of the earth.
Turns out, there was nothing to be concerned about. I just crafted a crazy story in my head.
And I realized, wow. There really is something to this “do nothing/relax” time!
YOU: What “stillness” activities sound like fun for you to incorporate into your day? Doing these activities consistently, even if just for 10 minutes could potentially save you hours of time and increase your mental clarity, focus and intuition!
Over to you:
Q: Which one of the 3 practices above will you embody this week? List your choice below!
ps: Do you struggle with managing your emotions? Are you ready to break free from old patterns in relationships that are keeping you stuck? Private coaching can help! Go here to book a consult call + check out other ways I can be of service to you right now.