I Said Yes to Me (and the Universe Had My Back)

Why Self-Love Sometimes Looks Like Saying no

Sometimes the bravest thing you can do is say no.

Breaking a lifelong pattern of saying yes when your body is clearly saying no takes courage — especially if you’ve spent years identifying as the good girl, the helper, the reliable one.

That shift, from self-abandonment to sovereignty, is exactly what we’re exploring inside my membership community, Goddess Circle Collective, all February.

And recently, I had an experience that brought this lesson home in a very real, embodied way.

When Saying Yes Costs You

At the beginning of this year, I claimed something clearly and intentionally:

I desire more aligned speaking engagements, opportunities where I can share my message of empowerment, intuition, and trusting yourself in ways that feel nourishing, not draining.

I anchored that desire within myself.

Not long after, I received a last-minute request to speak at a school. On paper, it looked like a yes. It was technically a speaking gig.

But intuitively, my body was already whispering, this will cost you more than it gives.

I ignored that voice.

I said yes anyway.

And just as my intuition predicted, the experience was disorganized, energetically draining, and left me more depleted than when I began. The money wasn’t worth the two full days it took my nervous system to recover afterward.

That night, I lit a candle and did something important.

I forgave myself.

I sent love to the organization, the audience, the organizers — and to myself. And from a calm, grounded place, I said quietly:

“We are done accepting things that drain us, Diana.”

Then I blew out the candle, my heart at peace.

The Test: Choosing Yourself in Real Time

The very next day, I received another request.

A similar speaking opportunity. One I had done before.

Immediately, my entire body contracted.

I started bargaining with myself.
Maybe I could shorten it.
Maybe it wouldn’t be as intense.
Maybe I was just reacting because of the previous experience.

I felt guilty. Nervous. Questioning myself.

Who was I to say no?

Before my mind could take over, I responded:

“Thank you so much for thinking of me, but I’m unavailable.”

Send.

The relief I felt in that moment was undeniable.

Of course, the mind tried to come back online.
Why haven’t they responded?
Did I make a mistake?
Was I too quick to say no?

A Magic Moment That Still Makes Me Smile

When I got home that day, I checked the mail.

Inside was an unexpected check from my health insurance, a random reimbursement, for the exact amount I would have been paid had I accepted that speaking engagement.

I actually laughed.

The message from the Universe was unmistakable.

Valentine’s Week, Reframed

With Valentine’s Day approaching, I feel called to name something gently.

For me, this week is less about traditional romance and more about honoring International Self-Love Day on February 13.

Self-love is not just bubble baths, affirmations, or treating yourself.
It’s about self-trust.
Listening to your body.
Honoring your intuition.
Choosing yourself even when it feels uncomfortable or inconvenient.

This experience was a reminder that self-love is an action, not a concept.

And when you practice it, life meets you with support in ways you could never plan.

What This Experience Taught Me

Here are the takeaways I want to leave you with:

• When you choose yourself, you are always supported — even if it feels uncomfortable at first
• You are allowed to say no without justifying, explaining, or shrinking
• Discomfort does not mean you are wrong; it often means you are growing
• When you honor your energy, something more aligned truly does arrive

Or, as Glennon Doyle so perfectly says: “You can do hard things.”

Your Turn

This week, where is life asking you to choose yourself more fully?

Have you ever said yes to yourself when it felt scary?
Have you ever disappointed someone else in order to stay true to your body, your intuition, or your truth?

I’d love to hear your story. Share in the comments.

Ready to Say Yes to You?

If you’re feeling called to say yes to the dream within you — and the relationship you desire, starting with the one you have with yourself, you may be a beautiful fit for 1:1 coaching.

I offer complimentary, no-pressure Intro to Clarity calls where we explore what’s going on in your life and whether support would feel aligned.

With love,
Diana