f—k being reasonable

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Do you tend to be the friend that everyone goes to for advice?

If you said yes, I’m guessing that people love to tell you a lot about their lives.

And often there is a pattern to what they share.

For me, I’ve noticed that regardless of who it is-a good friend, a person I met at Trader Joes check out, or some random Goddess I met at a conference, the themes circle around the following:

  • I am a workaholic and I feel like my life is a never ending To-Do list and no one appreciates me
  • I have no social life and no love life…I know something has to change
  • I’m tired of feeling isolated and alone but I don’t know what to do

Then I ask the bold question: “So, what are you going to change so you can you start loving yourself more? What do you do to take care of your Spirit?”

I sometimes get weird stares and a laundry list of rational excuses, mostly about how they need to focus on their career/business. Or their responsibilities. Or re-organizing the closet. 

I’m in the middle of a decluttering challenge, so while it sounds totally valid…I have to sigh. 

I’ve been there. So many times. I get it.

It’s scary to change.

It’s scary to trust.

It’s scary to not be in control all the damn time and trust that thing are going to work out

But here’s the deal:

We say we want to take time out of our busy lives, love ourselves and come back into balance but what we are really are saying is…I’ll get to that later…

as soon as I get the business or career stuff handled

as soon as I have more free time

as soon as the kids go to college

as soon as I have more money

as soon as as soon as as soon as…

Only “as soon as” never comes, does it?

Self-care and prioritizing our Soul go to the bottom of the to-list…. if it’s even on the list at all.

Pleasure and taking a new direction towards something fun seems frivolous, unnecessary, unreasonable. 

The idea of putting our needs and emotions above others’ we love seems selfish.

But, consider this.

Your dream life is rarely birthed when you are being ‘reasonable.’

Otherwise, you would have it already, wouldn’t you?

The Universe knows you are EXTRA-ordinary. 

It’s just waiting for you to get the memo so it can start helping you get what you want. 

But normally we’re too in our heads to actually listen or do anything about it.
The Universe doesn’t respond to you when you’re being ‘reasonable’ when your Soul is crying out for more. 

It responds to your request when you are relaxed, in a space of receiving and joy. Not stress. Or worry.

When you take time out for pleasure and Soul nourishing time, you become a magnet for the things you want.

  • My client slashed her work hours in half and started walking again and taking time to be with her Spirit. The result? Her quarterly income increased over 34%.
  • Another client treated herself to a massage and a movie in the middle of her work week. Just because she felt like it! The result? Creative inspiration, and sign-ups for her upcoming event

and another

  • Another client moved to a gym closer to her home and enrolled in regular yoga classes per her intuition and body requests. The result? Regular daily compliments from men (and women!) and one that calls and texts her often to ask her out and see how she’s feeling. 

Coincidence?

I think not.

This week’s Self-Love Soul Challenge:

What’s one “unreasonable” thing you can do for your Soul this week? Something that fills you with a feeling of “OMG I can’t do THAT! But wouldn’t that be neat….”

I give you permission to go for it Goddess.

Fuck reasonable.

And if you don’t like it after a week,  you can always go back to the way things were before.

No questions asked.

Your call.

It’s time to put yourself first.

PS: Are you ready to rip off the Band-Aid and step into a brand-new you, let’s talk so I can learn more about you and how I can help.  Schedule a 15 min complimentary consult call here. 

are they ready or are you wasting your time?

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Today’s Q+A is about marriage/commitment.

Q: I’ve been burned a lot in the past by men who couldn’t commit. I feel cautious dating again and am wondering, are there signs I should look for that the person I’m seeing is open for marriage?

A: Oooo, I love this question. It can feel really scary to put yourself out there only to discover that the person you’re interested in isn’t on the same page-in this case, around commitment.

There are 3 common dating behaviors I see in my private practice. 

One of them is a sign you can tell before you are monogomous.

The other two are for when you’ve been with the person awhile and want to know if you’re on track for the M-word 🙂

Check out the full answer below in this video:

Q: Have another sign you’d like to add? Share in a comment below!

ps: Would you like more specific support around your relationship or dating life?
Book a complimentary consultation to learn more about private coaching. No investment required and no obligation to purchase services. This is simply the first step in the process and my intent is that you leave the call with clarity if private coaching is the right next step for you and also what could be blocking you from creating the type of relationship you really want. 

i am open to receiving support

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Last week, I led an in-person Goddess Circle in Arizona and it blew my mind.

I learned what it means to truly trust that it’s safe to ask for help and that it didn’t mean I was any less of a leader because I needed assistance.

Long story short, my back totally went out, like the day before I was scheduled to teach.

And ironically, the name of the class was “Aligning with your Divine Purpose!”

Seriously, the Universe has a sense of humor.

I was hunched over at a 90 degree angle like an old lady totally misaligned and I didn’t know how I would make it there but I just knew in my belly, I had to show up, regardless of the state I was in physically.

I said a hurried prayer and just said to myself, “I’m going to be open to receiving support. It will be okay.”

And I kid you not, once I fully, fully, FULLY surrendered it all, I was at a stop light about 10 min away from the event space.

1) I get a text: “Hey, I got here early (my friend who signed up). Want me to give you Reiki before you go on? I can also help with the chairs.”

I’m open to receiving support.

2) I walk into the space and within 5 minutes, another two Goddesses show up early. One of them offers me half her gourmet sandwich (she thought I might be hungry) and offered to help put out the altar and the chocolates and grapes I brought.

I’m open to receiving support.

I didn’t try to “be strong.” I openly shared with everyone that I was uncomfortable but that I was so excited to be there because teaching and sharing IS my Divine Purpose.

And as the night went on, I felt such a softening in our group-sharing was happening, Truths were being told and ideas were being explored in a safe container. 

I realized, when you aren’t trying to be invincible, you just get to BE.

And that is a much more aligned place to come from as a leader and in the Highest Goddess version of yourself.

I felt a weight release near my sacrum and to my amazement, by the end of the evening, I was able to straighten up more than I had in the past 2 days!
3) After the event, I received another invite to have energy work done on my back and the energy was buzzing with love and sparkly energy that comes when there is Flow.

I’m open to receiving support.

I realize how much we try to do this thing called Life believing that we aren’t worthy of support.

And how liberating it is to finally drop that.

I’m so grateful for this experience and I invite you to reflect on where in your life you have been trying to pretend you don’t need help?

Where could assistance support your Path?

Have an amazing week!

onward + up oct! you ready?

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Happy October!

Lordy, lawdy! Where has 2019 gone?

I think I may have said that in last week’s newsletter but my head is seriously mystified at how fast this year is flying. 🙂

So…what does October hold?

If you’re new here, welcome! Every first week of the month, I share a Monthly Goddess Guidance Oracle video and pull some cards to interpret to give you an overview of the entire month.

Grab a sheet of paper and pen, and head over to watch it as I always recommend you pause the video after each card to jot down your own insights!

Enjoy

i have a weird issue (Q+A time!)

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It’s Q+A week, where I take questions that come up in our fabulous community.

Do you have a question you’d like me to answer on a future blog? Go here to share it!

Today’s is about self-sabotage…and too many dates.

Q: Diana, I have a weird issue. I have more than 4 dates booked this week and I know I should feel really excited but all I want to do is have some alone time with myself. I’ve been saying I want more dates and now I have them and I feel like I’m sabotaging. What should I do? 

Even if you are not currently dating, this applies to all commitments you are making to yourself and others, so check out the advice in this week’s video! 

Prefer to read? I also include my written answer below

A: This is not a weird issue-thank you for asking and sharing this!


First off, just want to acknowledge you for creating what you said you wanted-4 dates in a week is amazing! And I also hear a lot of self-judgement-whenever we use the word “should” that’s a cue to look at-what could be happening and what can easily happen when we get flooded with awesome invitations, but we haven’t made self-care a priority is this low-level feeling of resentment, which may be what you are experiencing. It’s less about the guys you’re booking dates with and more highlighting that you need to carve out alone/recharge time before you agree to dates. We only have a finite amount of energy in any given day or week, so making sure you are filling your own energetic bucket first is key! My recommendation is to look at your calendar and block off 1-2 days or even half days that are just for you. I call these Flow Days but basically that is your sacred time. No dates or other appointments get scheduled during those times unless you have the energy and want to. This will protect your energy, fill up your tank and make it much easier to say yes to those awesome dates!

Much love,
Diana

ps: Struggling with self-sabotage and ready to break the pattern once and for all?
Private coaching can help you do this! To see how it works and also give me a chance to learn more about your specific challenges and desires, book a complimentary consultation call right here. No obligation to purchase a service by booking this but if you would like to consider coaching with me, it is the first step!