The Universe wants to support you 100%.

It has no agenda.

It has no opinion.

It merely matches your dominant vibration and says, “Okay-let’s give you more of that!”

It wants you to be as joyful, happy or miserable as your frequency emits.

It is always listening.

And when it comes to finding love and having harmonious relationships, there are 4 core sabotaging behaviors that repel love from staying and keep you stuck in all areas of your life.

For each I have given you a specific example of how this could play out in real-life and what the Universe really hears when you exhibit each behavior.

Heads up: Be gentle with yourself as you read this. If you recognize that you have been engaging in one or more of these behaviors, simply notice what comes up. Acknowledging it is the first step to changing it.

1) saying you want something and doing the exact opposite

Ex: Saying you want to be a committed relationship but having regular sex with your ex who has made it clear he is seeing other women.

Universe hears: “You value no-strings-attached relationships so we will send you more people who also value that.”

2) thinking thoughts and taking actions that are divided-some are in alignment with what you declare and others are aligned with the opposite (talk about mixed messages to the Universe!)

Ex: If you desire to have relationships that are a two-way street where you feel respected and cherished, maybe you have a difficult conversation with a good friend about feeling like you aren’t always able to vent to her but at the same time, you are tolerating less-than-respectful behavior from a co-worker and not saying anything about it.

Universe hears: “You like getting the short end of the stick and being disrespected. We will send you more of that.”

3) breaking your commitments (to yourself and to others)

Ex: You make an appointment (with anyone from your mother to a business associate to your dentist) and you either don’t show up at all or cancel at the last minute because something else better came along.

Universe hears: “Your word and other people’s time are not important, so we will send you people who also don’t value your time and word.”

4) Ghosting aka giving off “avoidant” vibes

Ex: This one is pretty self-explanatory, but this can look like anything saying yes to a date and never answering any texts or phone calls to confirm where you’re meeting to getting an email from your boss and being too chicken to say how you really feel, so you just send it to the trash, hoping the issue will just magically disappear. Only it comes up again and again, usually in another relationship.

Universe hears: “You like to play games and you like to be chased more than you want to have a real relationship. So we will send you people who play lots of games with you too!”

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Why we continue these sabotaging behaviors:

1. Fear-that we are going to make the wrong decision. So we don’t make any, which is a decision in itself.
2. Fear of taking full responsibility for creating our life. If we don’t decide, it’s “someone else’s fault.” And we are off the hook. Only you’re not, because you co-create your reality with the Universe 24/7 so this leads to feelings of helplessness and a lack of confidence, two energies that repel quality relationships.
3. We are terrified of actually getting what we want! What would have to change if you welcomed in that soul mate today? Asked for that raise? Told your sister to take lay off you on X topic already? Change can feel scary, so we default to what keeps the very thing we want at bay.

Q: Which of the four behaviors speak to you to shift in order to have more of what you want-happiness, joy, inner confidence and love?

Share with us in the comments!

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