do you self-sabotage? here’s how to stop. asap.

It’s no secret that when you aren’t creating what you want in your life, particularly in relationships, it’s very likely that self-sabotage may be part of the puzzle.

We’ve all done it.

example: You say you are going to go off carbs for ten days, only to find yourself driving your ass to In and Out Burger after the fifth day and getting the fries, bread and the whole sha-bang.

example: You are a coach and you’ve created your first program. You’ve written authentic, juicy copy that makes you smile everyday you read it, you know it will change lives and you put it on your website ……and tell no one about it.  And wonder why no one has signed up.

example: You are very clear that you want to be in a long-term, committed, sexy relationship…but you are still having sex with your ex because no one else has showed up and you’ve come up a hundred reasons why you shouldn’t message back any guys on OkCupid.

No shame sister.

All three of the examples above are mine from various points in my Goddess life.

But if you’re done with the self-sabotage game, like really really done with it, and you are ready to manifest what you keep saying you want, there are 2 questions you must ask and answer honestly if you’re ever going to change the pattern.

Ready?

Hold your breath and count to ten.

Just kidding.

Here it is.

The Two Questions

Q1: What are the payoffs/perks/benefits you get from continuing to believe X story, X situation or thinking X thought?

Q2: What are you afraid will happen if you actually GET/HAVE/MANIFEST X desire?

When I first did this exercise years ago, I thought it was crazy.

How could there be any benefits to staying where I was? And the second question?

I was a kick-ass independent, courageous Goddess. I wasn’t afraid of change…or was I?

But when I let my logical mind stay open, and I relaxed my body, I asked again.

Nothing happened. I got super annoyed.

And then I asked again. My shoulders dropped. Progress.

And then again.

And finally, I started to get stuff to write down.

What came out, again just to give you an example using #3 was the following:

The Breakthrough

By continuing to engage with my ex, the pay-offs included: physical pleasure, attention and familiarity. It was comfortable.

When I asked myself what I was afraid would happen if I actually did stop seeing him and put myself out there again….and manifested a loving, long-term partnership with someone new, here’s what came up. Some of them were completely irrational but most of the time, fears are!

-I was afraid of them thinking I was strange for doing psychic/intuitive work, fearing they would try and make me get a regular job.

-I was afraid it wouldn’t work out and then I’d feel like a loser, having another failed relationship

-I was afraid my business would suffer if I gave it my all in love.

And on and on it went. I think I wrote a full page of fears.

No wonder I was subconsciously invested in staying single and comfortable with a casual relationship with an ex!

Who wants to experience all of that?

But once I saw them for what they were-subconscious fears and stories that I was choosing to subscribe to, I felt free.

Perfect? Heck no.

Completely unafraid and unstoppable?

No.

The most important piece.

But I had something more important than all of that.

A new awareness.

And with awareness, you start to change everything.

One day at a time.

With practice and a combo of spiritual and practical tools in your arsenal, you can make adjustments when you feel the fears creep up….before they start to run the show.

And you can actually hear the voice of your intuition instead of a fear-based subconscious voice that tries to trick you into believing a story that isn’t even real!

This is exactly what I teach in my upcoming virtual group program, Intuition Boot Camp (formerly called Intuition 101): 5 weeks to master the art of decision-making to boost your confidence, come back into balance and free your monkey mind! We start March 1….click here to get on the priority notification list so you’ll be the first to know when registration doors open! (super soon!!) 

Now over to you.10363775_10202795961518938_2428182819912217634_n

This week’s Soul question: Do you have a pattern you’re ready to change? Ask yourself either or both of the questions above and if you’re feeling brave, leave a comment on this blog so we can support you!

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Is it your intuition or wishful thinking?

Great news! Mercury retrograde is officially over. It’s time to put the past where it belongs so you can move forward to a very creative new cycle!

Part of what this new cycle calls for is that you trust yourself. And trust your intuition to guide you through important decisions that no doubt will be coming up for you to address.

This week, I’d love to share a simple question you can ask to discern if a message is really from your intuition… Or if it’s something else trying to confuse you like fear!

Clarification: After I shot the video I realized that I was a bit unclear!

Spirit may say something such as “Pay attention to how you feel around this person.” or even “It may be time to stop X.” But it will never use the word or phrase, “DON’T do X!”

It may not be time yet for you to know what is next if you are given a directive like above to consider stopping something, but it will always be presented in a gentle, emotionally-neutral delivery, even if the news is uncomfortable or unexpected!

Hope that helps and now over to you:

This week’s Soul question: Have you ever received a “hit” that you weren’t sure was your intuition? What happened and what did you learn from that? Leave a comment!

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a simple tip to find more time for the things you love

Q + A with Diana Dorell:

Q: I feel like no matter what I do, I never enough time left at the end of the day for the things I enjoy. I consider myself to be a great manifestor but something always seems to come up. I have been studying the Law of Attraction and I keep a consistent gratitude journal but I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. Help!

A: Watch the video below and after you watch, be sure to check out this week’s question and leave a comment in the conversation!

This week’s question: Have you ever struggled with the cycle of “not enough” time? What tips, strategies and advice helps you manage this? Leave a comment!

Tweetable from Diana:

No one is going to give you permission to prioritize yourself. TWEET THIS.

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The #1 Rookie Manifesting Mistake I Made (So You Don’t Make it Too!)

A few years back, I was living in the SF Bay Area and dancing professionally with a group in the Mission District.

One particularly grueling, sweat-filled rehearsal, we got a 20 minute lunch break and  yours truly in her infinite wisdom, totally spaced on bringing snacks or a lunch.

My options and time were limited.

But across the street was McD’s.

Now, I truly would rather gone anywhere else, but with 16 minutes and counting left until I had to summon some massive cosmic energy to dance for another few hours, I decided to take my chances.

I apologized in advance to my body.

“Hello, Welcome to McDonalds. Can me help you?” a friendly lady with a heavy accent asked me.

“Um, yea, I’ll have the McChicken, but please…just put lettuce and tomato. None of that sauce stuff.”

She looked at me kinda weird, like I said something in Sanskrit to her, but she nodded, tapped her buttons, I paid and she told me to move aside and wait for my number.

Time left to eat: 7 minutes.

Oh. My. Goddess my tummy was rumbling. I could taste the rubbery chicken in my mouth and all I could think of was grabbing it, scarfing it down and sprinting back to the studio.

“Number 7!”

Yay!

I grabbed it and just ran to the studio, figuring I could have 1 minute of peaceful eating on the floor.

I ran up the stairs, picked a corner and tore open the yellow wrapping like a starved dog.

And I took a bite. Bliss was coming.

But something tasted funny.

It seemed a little light.

I opened the sandwich and what was there?

Lots of lettuce. And. Tomato. Only.

Wrapped in bread.

The chicken was M.I.A.

The Lesson: PeekPhotographyDorall-0949

I wanted to cry and yell at that lady so bad, but it taught me an important lesson on manifesting.

Here it is.

Watch your words. You have to be specific.

I asked for lettuce and tomato only and well…that’s exactly what I got.

I could have blamed it on the lady’s limited English or I could take full responsibility as a powerful manifesting Goddess and next time, just clarify.

I chose the latter after that day.

Over to you:

This week’s Soul question- Have you ever made a request that was too vague and then gotten a vague answer or result back? What’s one specific thing you’d like to bring in for yourself this week? Leave a comment and let’s help circulate that into the Uni-verse!

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Much Love!

Diana

what’s your personal year vibration? find out inside!

How to Calculate Your Personal Year Number in 2016 and why that’s important!

You are a unique Soul and each year, there is a specific theme or vibration to help you tap into the lessons you came here to learn. I call it your Personal Year Number.

While the Universal energy of 2016 is a “9” (2+0+1+6=9) and that will definitely play a role in how you experience your year, think of it as an overcoat, with your Personal Year Vibration being your undies, the things you wear everyday 🙂

It’s super easy and fun!

Step 1: Add your day of birth and month of birth together.

Example: If your birthday is January 1, it would be 1+1=2

Step 2: Add the number above to the current 2016 year (9) and reduce to a single digit

Example: 2+9=11 1+1=2. Personal Year of 2.

Step 3: Voila! You know your Personal Year Number.

What it all means: What are Your Personal Year Themes?

If your Personal Year Number is a….

1-A great year to dive into a new adventure, blaze a new trail, go at it alone and stop waiting for other people to get on board with a great idea you have before you start. In short, it is a year “all about you” and that’s okay! Key words: risk-taking, adventure and trusting yourself

2-A year of partnership, learning how to work in a team, even if that team is calling on Spirit more. It’s a gentle vibration and your key words: “compassion, seeing two sides of the story and putting relationships first

3-A year of creativity, learning how to take your multiple passions and have fun! Your social calendar may be full this year, so it will be important for you to check in with yourself and only say yes to the invites that light you up! You may want to look into a creative class or new hobby…or just change your hair. Key words: Beauty, creativity, joy

4-A year of hard work, setting structures in place that will create a strong foundation for a successful and secure year. A chance to tear everything down and re-build it again based on who you are now vs. who you were. Financial education, investments and tackling inner beliefs around worthiness is par for the course. Key words: structure, getting a schedule, managing your money and time

5-A year of travel, change and communication. Anything goes in this year and it may feel like things change on a dime, but know that it’s all in your favor, even when it seems irritating. A great year to put yourself out there speaking, writing, traveling and designing something new. Key words: movement, change and communication in all forms

6-A year of birthing something, getting situated on the homefront and dealing with family dynamics. This energy is also about tapping into your creative gifts and if you’ve been wanting to start a side business or build a new business with you as the boss, it’s a great year to do that and voice your needs!

Key words: children/creating, family/home, and putting yourself first so you can take care of others (the whole “keep momma happy-then everyone’s happy” is perfect. Even the number looks like a pregnant woman holding her baby!)

7-A year of spirituality, learning about who you are in the world and going within. You may feel like being alone way more than you normally do and that’s okay! The 7 vibration is about cultivating your inner power and intuitive gifts and it’s hard to do that when you’re always around people, so take the time to carve out sacred silence. Keep a journal nearby as you may get some of your most powerful ideas that you’ll integrate later! Key words: meditation/silence, spiritual nourishment and heightened intuition.

8- A year of expansion, stepping into your inner CEO and tearing down old beliefs that kept you from the life you really really desire but haven’t lived yet because of fears, especially around money, havingness and deserving of the “good life” (however you define that). A great year for building or expanding a business or career path and building a team around you, even if that team includes a stronger partnership with your spouse or close friends. You are not alone!

Key words: infinite possibility, financial and personal success, taking your dreams seriously.

9-A year of completion, karmic rewards and lessons and knowledge. This is the year where you may feel guided to learn about other cultures or think outside the box in all areas of your life. You want to do it your way and you may question authority or anyone who calls himself an “expert.” A great year for teaching and sharing the wisdom you’ve gained. Key words: teaching, creating your own philosophy and new belief system, acceptance.

Over to you: What’s your personal year number? What is one thing you are excited to create for yourself in 2016? Share it with me by clicking the “Leave a Comment” button below and let’s start the energy moving!

All my love,

credit: peek-photography.nyc

credit: peek-photography.nyc

Diana

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